Here are a few things concert-goers should know.

1. Don’t shove. Let people through to get to their friends and family. We all want to enjoy the concert, don’t get grumpy or attack the person trying to find the people with whom they came to the concert. It just gets everyone upset. Even if there is “no space”, move over just a little. Be human.

2. If it’s a closed arena, please don’t smoke. There is nowhere for your smoke to go but into other people’s faces. It’s selfish, inconsiderate and not to mention illegal.

3. If you’re right at the front, there is no space for a mosh pit, so don’t make one. You can hurt other people, and all that it will result in is anger and maybe even disaster.

4. Don’t bring huge bags or hats that will either block people’s view, or take up precious space. Take only what you need.

5. Be kind to short people. It’s not their fault that their genes have an awful sense of humour.

6. Stop complaining. There will be crowds, there will be shoving, there will be that one person who pisses you off, but complain at home afterwards. Nobody else cares about your woes about that girl in heels who just stepped on your toes.

7. Don’t wear heels. It’s just stupid. Nobody cares how you dress to a concert. Especially if it’s a rock concert, you just look silly.

8. Bring a water bottle or some container that will allow you to drink without spilling. Those plastic cups they give us at concerts suck. They crack along the sides, are wide enough to be the Grand Canyon and splish-splash everywhere.

9. Don’t hog the merchandise tent. We haven’t got all day for you to make up your mind about the blue or the red t-shirt which says the same thing. Hang in the back, decide on what you want, have your money out and move fast. We don’t want to wait in line and miss the show because you’re undecided or unprepared.

10. Don’t talk during songs, especially the slower ones. People are there to listen.

11. If you don’t like the concert, leave. Don’t heckle.

12. Posters are annoying. Please don’t hold them up during the entire show. You block people’s view. It’s selfish and pointless. Chances are the artist will not see it unless you’re in the front row.

13. Sucking face isn’t appealing. PDAs are unwelcome, especially in a tight crowd. Also, you end up looking like desperate shag-hags.

14. If you want to sit down, go to the back of the crowd.

15. Your cellphone’s camera is not as amazing as you think, regardless of how much you paid for it. Don’t block people for a tiny shot of the lead singer, which is going to be blurred and grainy anyway.

16. Don’t shout for the artist to play your favourite song unless you’re a metre away from them.

17. If you don’t like the opening act, shut up and let the people who do enjoy it.

18. Please don’t heckle at the photographers and ask them to take pictures of you and then e-mail them. It won’t happen. They’re too busy thinking about getting the shots, editing and filing them for the next day’s newspaper. It may be an awesome job, but it’s still a job, and being in the photography pit is their work.

19. If someone faints, don’t laugh. Help them. They may actually be having a heart attack.

20. We all want to see the show and enjoy it. Even if you don’t think of points 1 to 19, just be considerate, kind and accommodating. Nothing ruins a once-in-a-lifetime experience more than a douchebag.