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Mon Jan 26 02:19:48 SAST 2015

Five (kinda gross) fetishes Twilight caters to

Times LIVE | 15 November, 2012 12:54
Twilight

Twilight is pretty much porn minus the porn, and as such caters to a large variety of fetishes. Here we count down the five creepiest.

5: Necrophilia

Now normally, because Edward is the vampire we would say that the necrophilia is from Bella’s side. However, as we have seen Kristen Stewart’s acting, we figure it’s a tie.

4: Bestiality

Jacob is sold as a very muscular werewolf, who spends the bulk of the saga humping Bella’s leg. While ultimately more likeable than sullen Cullen, we have to admit the fleas may be a turnoff.

3: Stalking

The entire saga starts off with Edward climbing into Bella’s room…

2: Cannibalism

… and continues with Edward revealing that the source of his attraction is that she smells delicious. To eat.

1: Extreme paedophilia

Okay, so you have two characters ‘in love’ with your main heroine, and the fandom is rooting for the wrong one, how do you solve it? If you are Stephenie Meyer you make the accidentally not abhorrent one fall in love with the heroine’s unborn foetus. Problem solved!

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