After the wedding reception, held in Tokyo (imagine them all in a room, toasting to a CGI avatar ...), SAL9000 whisked Nene, in the form of his Nintendo DS, off for a honeymoon in Guam. Then he broadcast the whole holiday on a Japanese video-sharing website (please don't tell me he tried to have sex with her). 'Love Plus' requires players to woo their "girlfriend" with all the usual rubbish. If you fail to satisfy her, the game restarts after 100 days. I want to feel sorry for the likes of Nene having to put up with the advances of inadequate and slightly-perspiring creeps, yet I'm not sure if the sympathy I feel actually exists.

They said it:

I don't think we would have used Volkswagen or Citroën." - Briton Samantha Smyth, who, along with boyfriend Tony Richardson, named her daughter 'Kia' after giving birth to her in a seven-seater Kia Carens