Cape Town during the December holidays means that, in all likelihood, there's a raging south-easter out there, whipping the beaches into sandstorms that strip the flesh off you and grind your bones to dust.
It's a good thing, then, that the Mother City's not just about sand and sea. Here is a selection of the area's other, in some cases less obvious attractions (some of them are quite adult-friendly, too).
Guaranteed hours of good, cheap fun for children of all ages (and their parents), the "scratch patch" concept started in Simon's Town in 1970 and has since spread to other parts of the world.
Given that almost half of the earth's gemstones are found in Southern Africa, the idea seems a natural one: you're given a bag - the size of which depends on your budget, but they start at about R15 - and you're let loose to scratch around and take your pick from a floor covered with thousands of tumble-polished gemstones.
There are plenty of stones to choose from: tiger's eye, rose quartz, amethyst, jasper, agates, crystals and - if you're lucky - lapis lazuli and blue lace agate among other exotic stones. It's an affordable and rather uplifting experience. And, hogwash about the stones' mystical powers aside, they really do have a calming effect on children.
Simon's Town: Dido Valley Road
Open Monday to Friday from 8.30am to 4.45pm, and weekends and public holidays from 9am to 5.30pm. Phone 021-786-2020
V&A Waterfront: Dock Road (opposite the aquarium)
Open daily from 9am to 6pm. 021-419-9429
One of the city's better tourist attractions, the aquarium is home to some 3000 sea creatures - sharks, penguins, turtles and, of course, fish. With 2008 the international Year of the Frog, the "Beyond the Pond" amphibian exhibit is a worthy addition.
It's worthwhile noting the feeding times at the aquarium if you're planning a visit. Sharks and other predators are fed at 3pm daily; the penguins twice a day at 11.30am and 2.30pm; and the fish in the kelp-forest exhibit at noon (except Sundays).
The children's programme is rather handy, too. The aquarium has a lot to offer kids - including organised parties with guided tours. For those who don't mind sharing their water with sharks, there are always diving opportunities.
V&A Waterfront, Dock Road
Open daily, 9.30am to 6pm. Adults R88; children aged 4 - 13 R42; children aged 14 - 17 R68; kids under four get in free. For info, visit www.aquarium.co.za or call 021-418-3823
Not your usual winelands experience, Spier has two exciting conservation projects that offer close encounters with wildlife.
The Eagle Encounters Raptor Rehabilitation Centre is where birds of prey are rehabilitated. It relies on income generated by tourism to drive various programmes, including the release of rehabilitated birds back into the wild.
Visitors can watch how ancient falconry techniques are used to train birds to hunt and flying demonstrations are held daily.
The estate also has a group of hand-raised cheetahs in the care of the Cheetah Outreach Programme which aims to raise awareness of the plight of cheetahs in Southern Africa. You can learn about the cats from a distance - or go inside an enclosure for a closer look.
Spier wine estate, R310 Lynedoch Road, Stellenbosch
Website: www.spier.co.za Eagle Encounters - R20 per person for entry. Different shows run every hour from 11am till 4pm. Prices range from R20 to R50 per person, with 50% off for kids under 12. Call 021-858-1826 or see www.eagle-encounters.co.zaCheetah Outreach - R10 per person Monday to Friday; R5 on weekends and holidays. A personal encounter with adult cats is R90 for adults, R45 for kids. Cub encounters are R180 for adults, R90 for kids. For information, call 021-809-1188
This primate experience is second perhaps only to visiting the gorillas in the highlands of central Africa - at least according to the visitors' book.
Developed by the Baboon Matters conservation group, this project aims to raise awareness of the plight of the Cape's remaining Chacma baboons, who are under pressure as their wilderness habitat shrinks under Cape Town's urban sprawl.
Trained guides lead small parties - a maximum of six - on walks of two to three hours through the hills surrounding Glencairn and Kommetjie to meet the troops in their home territories. It is quite safe as long as you obey the simple rules.
Baboon Matters, Cruiser Close, Sun Valley
R275 for adults and R140 for kids under 16. Walks leave in summer at 8.30am and 3pm. For info, visit www.baboonmatters.org.za or call 021-785-7493
Among the various children's and family-oriented productions at the city's theatres over the season are some classics, including:
- The Elves and the Shoemaker: A singalong fairytale. Expect Jingle Bells, Deck the Halls and White Christmas. For kids aged three to eight. At the Baxter Theatre until December 23.
-Red Riding Hood: Highlights in this production of the eternal story of the naughty little girl who disobeys her mother and, instead of taking the safe road to visit granny, goes into the woods where she encounters a big bad wolf, include a rock-and-roll granny and an hilarious striptease from the wolf. For kids aged three to eight. At the Baxter Theatre, January 4 to 12.
Baxter Theatre, Main Road, Rondebosch Tickets cost R35. For more, call 021-685-7880 or visit www.baxter.co.za
- Winnie the Pooh: Classic stuff from AA Milne, in which Pooh and Piglet set off in the snow to find a woozle, and Eeyore, Tigger, Kanga, Roo, Owl, Rabbit and Christopher Robin find fun en route to the North Pole. For kids of all ages. At the Artscape from December 12 to 23.
Artscape, DF Malan Street, Foreshore Tickets cost R40. Call 021-410-9800, box office 021-410-9838, or see www.artscape.co.za
- The Night Before Christmas: Musical about a little girl, Emily, who's waiting for Christmas morning to arrive. The cast of characters includes Eddie the mouse, the family cat, a cowardly toy soldier and even a fairy on top of a tree. For kids aged three and up. At the NewSpace Theatre until December 24.
NewSpace Theatre, 44 Long Street
R60. Call the box office (10am to 10pm) on 021-422-522 or book at Computicket 083-915-000. Inquiries 082-569-7660 or visit www.newspacetheatre.co.za
A cheerful jumble of everything a little kid could want - jungle gyms, sandpits, pedal cars, rowing boats, jumping castles, and a miniature train for the smaller ones. There are herds of ponies and quad bikes for the older kids, so that should keep everyone happy for hours.
Meanwhile, the oldies can sit back and enjoy refreshments as Bugz is known for its food. In all, it's worth the trek to the northern suburbs.
Should the weather not be playing along, there's an indoor party area with laser toys, magic shows and more.
There are two Very Merry Christmas Parties on the cards, on December 15 and 18, with Santas, elves, clowns, stiltwalkers and more. Booking essential.
Bugz Playpark, 56 Tarentaal Street, Joostenbergvlakte, Kraaifontein R20 entry, then R5 to R20 for individual rides. For information, call 021-988-8836 or visit www.bugzplaypark.co.za
At this historical Cape farmstead on the southern Peninsula, adults can chill out with food and wine while taking in the views from the restaurant's terrace, or nose around in the farmstall or the arts and craft shops.
For kids, there's a farmyard petting zoo and a snake park, where the slithering attractions include a yellow anaconda, Californian king snake, spitting cobras, an African rock python and the oddly-named yellow rat snake.
For bigger kids, 12 and older, the Imhoff Equestrian Centre has two-hour guided horse rides on the beach.
Still in the saddle, the farm is probably one of the few places in the country where you can ride a camel.
And, as if that wasn't enough, kids can get their faces painted as well.
Imhoff Farm, Kommetjie Road, Kommetjie
Open daily. For more information, visit www.imhofffarm.co.za or call 021-783-4545
South Africa could really use more attractions like the Sciencentre if it is ever to bootstrap itself up technologically.
The centre, in Canal Walk shopping centre, has over 300 interactive displays that will give kids a feel for physics and science. All displays are up for grabs so it's truly hands-on learning. Exhibits range from nuclear power (perhaps it's easier to sell the Pebble-Bed Modular Reactor to kids than to adults) to the scourge of tik.
While educational outings do sound a bit like defeating the purpose of school holidays, exhibits like the human gyroscope (in which kids can experience the weightlessness of space travel), a "kids only" construction site (they'll probably do a better job than adults) and the mindball (a game played using brainwaves) will soon put paid to that notion.
Call the centre to inquire about their daily programmes.
MTN Sciencentre, 407 Canal Walk (upper level, Entrance 5), Century City
Open Sunday to Thursday 9am to 6pm; Friday and Saturday 9am to 9pm. Open all public holidays, except Christmas. Kids 3 to 18 pay R28; adults R22. Call 021-529-8100 or see www.mtnsciencentre.org.za
No, this is not the Jamaican-themed restaurant chain, but an exciting toboggan family park.
Toboggans take a maximum of two people (children under eight must be accompanied by an adult) and hit a top speed of 40km/h as they hurtle down a 820m stainless steel track, made of deep drawn curved sections, bends and straights.
Cool Runnings, off Carl Cronje Drive, opposite the Bellville Velodrome
Open Tuesday to Friday 12pm to 6pm; Saturday, Sunday and holidays 9am to 6pm. Kids under 14 pay from R20 for a single ride to R200 for a day pass. Adults pay R25 to R250. For more, call 021- 949-4439 or visit www.toboggan.co.za
In this mother of a theme park, children's attractions include bumper cars, water rides, carousels, roundabouts, antique cars on monorails, ferris wheels and all the usual fun of the fair.
Family attractions include splatterball, mini-golf, an eight-seater simulator that takes its passengers on highly realistic journeys to a slot-car race track or the International Space Station, among others.
Ratanga Junction, Century City, take the Sable Road turnoff from the N1
Open from December 4 until January 12 but closed on Christmas Day. Adventurer Rider Tickets are R132 (people over 1.3m); Mini Adventurer Rider Tickets R65 (under 1.3m). Non Rider tickets are R40. For more information, call 0861-200-300 or visit www.ratanga.co.za
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