Do be a dick

To my mind the most destructive, harmful and generally terrible idea anybody has ever had is encapsulated in the phrase "Don't be a dick".

Take for example a recent issue with the Daily Show - they were highlighted a diner that offered a discount for people who prayed.

Now this is actually illegal in the United States.

"All persons shall be entitled to the full and equal enjoyment of the goods, services, facilities, privileges, advantages, and accommodations of any place of public accommodation, as defined in this section, without discrimination or segregation on the ground of race, color, religion, or national origin."

Public accommodations includes diners.

This is a pretty good law - before it came into place businesses had a habit of getting together and deciding not to serve "those" people, effectively making it impossible to live in small town America if you didn't fit the local business owners'  idea of their kind of people.

In 2012, Jessica Ahlquist took her school to court over a school prayer banner, and won. While the case was on she was on the receiving end of death threats, and the Democratic senator of Rhode Island called her an 'evil little thing' shortly after she won.

It got so bad she needed a police escort to go to class and back.

The Freedom From Religious Foundation decided to send her some flowers, as a sign of support. Two local florists refused because of her atheism.

Ever since then the foundation has expanded its mission to include violations of that particular law, and thus when a diner gave discounts for public prayer - the foundation sent them a letter, resulting in the promotion being dropped.

"After the owner of Mary's Gourmet Diner (grudgingly) did the right thing, FFRF members around the country were encouraged to thank her, and locals were encouraged to patronise her establishment."

How did the Daily Show tackle the issue? Basically by calling the head of the FFRF a "dick" over the whole thing.

And here is where I get pissed off - because it reminds me distinctly of something Martin Luther King Jnr wrote in his letter from Birmingham Jail.

He wrote:

“I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro’s great stumbling block in his stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen’s Councillor or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate, who is more devoted to “order” than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice; who constantly says: “I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I cannot agree with your methods of direct action”; who paternalistically believes he can set the timetable for another man’s freedom; who lives by a mythical concept of time and who constantly advises the Negro to wait for a “more convenient season.””

The diner may have been actively discriminating in a manner that went against the law, but it was the "moderate" voice of the Daily Show that called the FFRF dicks for complaining about it.

Now you might think that I am wrong to bring up a civil rights leader for this - he dealt with way worse things, but it is important to note that the law in question was a victory for the civil rights movement.

Taking offense in this case is using the magnitude of the civil rights movement's struggle, to avoid having to deal with what they were struggling for.

Which is a neat trick for avoiding having to deal with the validity of a complaint - but still just a trick.

This is of course a minor example of the same thing going on that every group that has ever complained about injustice has had to face. When women complained about a tasteless shirt during the ESA comet landing - you can bet there were all sorts of people playing the same game.

The guy wearing that shirt - apologised and said he wouldn't do it again. He was fine, meanwhile there are still people going on about how dickish it was for feminists to complain about what was "just a shirt".

He was still in the wrong, he apologised and what is the problem? That people complained in the first place.

The offence taken in these cases is at the fact people complained in the first place, as though there is no right to complain, as though complaining is itself being "a dick."

And that is more socially destructive than any dick could be, it is the mantra of the comfortable, not the good because if nobody complains nothing gets done.

It forces a society where you can't so much as yelp in pain if someone treads on your foot. If you are angry, I say be a dick about it - because otherwise you don't get heard and nothing gets done about it.

It is far better to live in a society working towards solutions, than one where everyone is grinding their teeth.