Thu Oct 27 12:47:22 SAST 2016

Love is an open Facebook

Jennifer Notoane | 25 February, 2015 13:55
Facebook logo.

I used to think my brother’s idea of letting his girlfriend have access to his Facebook profile and other social networks was a tad crazy until recently.

While watching anime, I had an epiphany and my brother’s method didn’t seem so crazy after all. Relationships are hard enough. Everybody seems to be working or trying to achieve something but no one is working on building with someone or at something bigger than themselves.

I have a very simple life rule that I abide by no matter what and that rule is: Always be honest.

It’s easier living an honest life than stacking bricks of lies because they will eventually crumble under pressure and what is built on a lie usually ends with the truth. So with that being said, let me go back to my brother’s method so that I can paint you a picture.

We live in a crazy world. By crazy I mean relationships have become Facebook statuses and arguments have turned into open doors for outsiders to come and try to tear down your happy home.

But somehow in the midst of this lustful jungle, my brother managed to live an honest life. He actually managed to eliminate suspicion by simply letting his girlfriend know what goes on beyond the Facebook wallposts and Twitter posts.

He merely let his partner see what he goes through on a day to day basis; which were girls offering themselves at him knowing full well that he is in a committed relationship.

I think you get my point by now. When did relationships turn into “hi, hw r u”? And later to posting pictures of random girls and guys snuggled near you just to get even with your partner?

When did relationships turn into monogamy only when we are together but as soon as you leave I have 50 contacts on BBM waiting to chat me up and keep me warm until your physical presence returns?

When did relationships turn into a relationship with options waiting to jump in as soon as you say something stupid like “Chris Brown can’t dance”? When did actual conversations become replaced by emojis and emoticons.

Why get into a relationship when you still have other potential suitors auditioning for the role of lover. Why get into a relationship only to be unfaithful online but faithful when your phone’s battery is low? Why even bother being monogamous if all you do is perv over Twitter avis, Instagram and Facebook pictures? Why mutter “I love you” with a mouth full of lies.

Cheating doesn’t start with the act but actually begins with the thought of you being with someone other than your partner. Someone once said to me that I expect too much from a messed up society.

I simply said I never expect anything from anyone but I expect way too much from myself to let myself down so easily. Being unfaithful has become so easy and pleasurable thanks to social networks but then again we shouldn’t blame the cigarette for addiction.

The smoker should shoulder culpability for their poor decision-making. We can’t keep shifting the blame to external factors instead of looking deep into ourselves.

If love the thought of being with 10 partners at the same time, then by all means leave monogamy to people who can actually commit to it. If you know you are fickle and are prone to having “one foot in and one foot out”, then don’t lead people on.

I apologise for stating the obvious and reminding people that being faithful and unfaithful online is cheating but someone had to “kill people’s vibes for a bit”.

With that said, would you ever trade social media passwords or your phone with your partner for a day? Try it - it might save you from committing to someone who’s already committed to @kinkybae12 or @hunkboy69 and you…


If you have an opinion you would like to share on this article, please send us an e-mail to the Times LIVE iLIVE team. In the mean time, click here to view the Times LIVE iLIVE section.