Phumla Matjila: A new relationship is exciting. Yes? It has challenges, of course, but also thrills. No?

Oh, the pleasantries and the compliments. Oh, the allure of eccentricities. After all, no one is perfect, right?

Even more challenging is a partnership between people who have been in a relationship before and it didn't quite work out as expected.

If you were the one in the relationship who was hurt, it is hard not to bring the baggage of past relationships to your current relationship. Especially if your current partner forms a huge part of that baggage from the past.

But this does not stop people from getting back together - from trying once again to make it work in spite of those challenges.

And when a month, two months . a year passes with the pleasantries still at a healthy level and the compliments have not plunged to worryingly low levels - and the eccentricities are still alluring, not alienating - then there is reason to celebrate. There's something special there. Yes?

For Libyan leader Muammar Gaddafi a year of nurturing a promising relationship with Italy - given the two countries' colonial history - was enough to make him dust off his colonel's uniform to celebrate a budding relationship.

In fact, a year was reason enough for Brother Leader to fuel the jet, load the tents, gather his finest horses and their riders, and fly to Italy for the first time in 40 years.

It took a lot more than just nurturing the relationship from Papi's side, I beg your pardon, Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi's side, to improve relations with Italy.

In 2008, Italy agreed to compensate Libya with a $5-billion package - comprising construction projects, student grants and pensions for Libyan soldiers - for the hardships suffered during Italy's colonial rule from 1911 to 1941.

After all, what's a couple of billion dollars compared to a nation's suffering for decades?

So, Brother Leader welcomed the gesture - which strengthened the olive branch that Italy extended to Libya earlier - as a sign that Berlusconi's government takes this relationship seriously.

Brother Leader even told news agency AP in June last year, during his four-day visit to mark the first anniversary of friendship ties with Italy: "We hail this generation of Italians for having resolved with extreme courage the questions of the past."

The celebrations in Rome were fit for soulmates. Gaddafi was even given a spot on which to put up his tent. It was perfect.

So, this year when the Italy-Libya relationship reached its second year with no major upset, a celebration wouldn't be enough, would it? A crusade is in order, no?

After all, Brother Leader has to know that Italy accepts him and all that makes him who he is.

His behaviour, for lack of a better comparison, sometimes resembles that of a betrayed bride who is still in love with her partner but wants to make the terms of her return home crystal clear.

I can sympathise with Libya, especially given the acrimonious break-up with trusted long-term partner Switzerland over the arrest of Gaddafi's son, Hannibal.

With Switzerland now an arch-enemy, Libya is pulling out all the stops to test Italy's faithfulness and sense of commitment.

And so, to mark the second anniversary of the Libya-Italy friendship accord, Brother Leader last week packed his tents, horses and entourage and headed to Italy, as he did last year.

But this year the pomp and ceremony didn't seem quite enough to mark such a two-year commitment. Brother Leader wanted a platform from which to lecture to as many Italians as possible about Islam.

I'm not sure whose idea it was - Brother Leader's or Loverman extraordinaire Berlusconi's - to use a model agency to recruit women to attend the Gaddafi Lecture.

Last Sunday night, 500 young Italian women, who had reportedly been paid to attend, gathered to hear Gaddafi speak about Islam, hoping that, by the time he was done, the majority would convert.

It appears that, until last Sunday, Gaddafi's eccentricities didn't bother Italians. Now, they are wondering if the relationship is worth all that oil, I mean trouble.

One thing's for sure, Gaddafi is not going to give it up easily, no?