Somewhat serious, somewhat fun


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Fred Khumalo


Writer Fred Khumalo's column is a heady mix of everything about nothing. He deals with serious topics in a humorous way. Holy cows are slaughtered, stereotypes are taken, thrown in the air, looked at from all possible angles and then sliced with the sword of reason.

Latest Columns

Rat-tat-tat! This is how we roll now?

ISPENT last weekend at my parents' house in KwaZulu-Natal - and discovered a "game" that chilled me to the marrow.

A hairstyle only public works could have built

In the much talked-about stand-off between public protector Thuli Madonsela and national police commissioner Bheki Cele, there's a character who seems to be getting off scot-free, the Minister of Public Works, Gwen Mahlangu-Nkabinde, whose head should also roll.

Bang, bang - and credibility's dead

I know that movies - especially of the Hollywood variety - are generally about entertainment, shock and suspense of disbelief.

Celebrities be warned, we are watching your every move

Is that a baby bump, or is it a food bump? Are you wearing those sunglasses because you are feeling cool, or are you hiding the effects of last night's babalaas, or did your spouse bang you about last night? Were you sober or were you sozzled when you pranged that car of yours?

Rude road hogs now taxi for take-off in South Africa

OKAY, okay. Can you run that by me once again? The SA National Taxi Council is about to launch a low-cost airline? If this story had broken two months ago, I would have dismissed it as a belated April Fool's joke. But no, after several attempts at trying to get a denial from Santaco, I have been told that the taxi association is serious about the announcement they made this week.

Fan these fragrant winds of change

NO sooner had Michelle Obama finished her address at Soweto's Regina Mundi Church than the peacetime revolutionaries of this republic began wondering aloud: "Why do we need an American to inspire us? What are these Americans trying to extract from our country now? They must go back home and fix their own s**t. We need African solutions for African problems. Blah blah."

Your shy son has updated his status

MY mother, who tried but failed miserably to cure me of my shyness, would be surprised to learn that I now have 1170 friends ... and still counting.

Too much flesh can make you go gaga

In keeping with her characteristic public insolence, Lady Gaga appeared at a fashion show in New York this week wearing ... no, with her body covered in, one of her crazy outfits, if those rags could be called an outfit at all. And she was on stilts, for I can't describe those things as shoes. I don't have to describe them, just look at the pictures.