SHRINK RAP

WHAT you are revealing in your question is the politics of your marital relationship.

A mature relationship is like a democracy. In a vibrant dynamic democracy conflict is leveraged in a way that leads to deeper understanding of yourself and your partner.

The differences that give rise to conflict would be respected and serve as a reminder that your spouse is not an extension of you, but an independent person.

If you would like to influence her with your beliefs, you need to represent your beliefs in a way that wins her admiration. That means being a person whose approach to the relationship and behaviour make your beliefs appear like something worth aspiring to. This requires taking a loving, respectful and tolerant view of how your wife chooses to see the world. - Leonard Carr

SUPERNANNY

Agreeing to disagree and remaining in a relationship requires maturity from both parties. If you value individuality as part of your relationship, then it is about being able to allow both people in the relationship to have their own opinions, and not diminish the value of the relationship.

In this country, there is a history of politics shaping our value system and social behaviour. It is at this level that you need to focus your attention. Of course, one can just agree to not engage in conversation about what is in the newspaper, or only talk about positive news.

In politics, if you look for what is common ground the differences will possibly diminish. - Stephanie Dawson-Cosser