Opinion: when it comes to phallic symbols, Trump's tie is a flop

Last weekend was filled with fashion fodder that will undoubtedly find its way down a runaway and into a store near you.

It doesn't take Li Edelkoort, the famous trend forecaster , to predict that the see-through backpack will be next season's hottest accessory - it was ubiquitous at the Women's March on Washington on Saturday.

We're also likely to see powder blue cropping up in collections thanks to Melania Trump channelling one of Jackie O's favourite colours when she chose a Ralph Lauren outfit for her husband's inauguration.

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One fashion statement we hope won't find its way onto the streets is The Donald's overly long tie.

The necktie became fashionable garb for political figures in the 17th century. After Croatian mercenaries, who wore pieces of cloth around their necks to symbolise their rank, were hired to take part in the Thirty Year War, the boy-king Louis XIV took to wearing lace "cravats" in 1646. This started a craze among the French nobility who donned the same in colours signifying their political allegiances.

Fast forward 371 years and an ugly version hangs from the neck of the Free World's new leader.

Men don't have a lot to play with when it comes to formal fashion statements. In a sea of suits, the tie must say it all.

The extra long, extra wide tie that Trump wore to his inauguration confirms a few things about the man.

Bloomberg.com says the width of a tie indicates slack in the economy: when there's more money to go around, the wider the tie grows. (This is similar to the women's Hemline Index - a theory presented by economist George Taylor in 1926 - which suggests that hemlines on women's dresses rise along with stock prices.)

But, rather than an indication of his prowess in economics, the length of his tie shows that Trump is out of touch with current sartorial nous that says the tip of a man's tie should fall right in the middle of his waistband or his belt - no longer.

''His biggest mistake (besides the tan and hair) is the length of his tie," says Jessica Cadmus, a personal stylist known as The Wardrobe Whisperer. ''It's ludicrous, and no one is pointing it out. It's egregiously long."

block_quotes_start Anthropologists say ties play into primal masculinity by creating an arrow of fabric pointing to the crown jewels block_quotes_end

Anthropologists say ties play into primal masculinity by creating an arrow of fabric pointing to the crown jewels. Trump's tie, however, goes way too far, taking our eyes to a place we'd usually avert them from. (Perhaps that's his not-so-subtle intention.)

Patrick Grant, creative director of Savile Row tailors Norton & Sons, says: "The way Trump's tie swings pendulously around his crotch is phallic and deeply suggestive, perhaps subliminally, perhaps not."

Sadly, JCrew - often regarded as an indicator of mass-market trends - announced that it's adding 6mm to the width of its ties. Will Markham in Mzansi follow suit? Please say no.

• This article was originally published in The Times.