I was online reading articles about the current racial tensions in South Africa and it got me thinking: do I harbour prejudices towards any group of people? I did not have to think far, not far at all, as my e-mail had the evidence ...I am a self-employed creative and when I pitch I attach a 500-word biography with a nice smiling photo (the guy you want to do business with). As I choose not to be on LinkedIn or other social media networks, it saves time when having that first meeting.My bio says, "I wrote and directed a short film Benni Has Two Mothers which was part of the South African Gay & Lesbian Film Festival 2007 ... I happen to be straight (not gay) and a very proud supporter of many minority rights."I never thought much of it, but since we are in the season of taking political offence I took note when a friend laughed at that part of my biography. Why do I need to point out that I am straight, and "not gay" in brackets (just to be sure)? The classic "but" is at work here. Was I a closet homophobe? Was it time to come out and take membership in Cape Town's Gay Bashing Society? I do not consider myself homophobic, and like white people with black friends, I also have my share of gay friends. So why did it start to feel not cool to have that on my bio? It appeared I was a person who felt the need to distance himself from gays. It was especially not cool that having been afforded the opportunity by the Gay & Lesbian Film Festival to make my first film, here I was throwing the movement under the bus.I had to introspect. Was I a closet homophobe? Was it time to come out and take membership in Cape Town's Gay Bashing Society? No, I have nothing but love for the gay community, or for any movement calling for the equal treatment of people.I reflected on growing up in '90s Windhoek (early development vibes). I do not recall an instance when anyone was discriminated against on account of being gay (or a moffie as they are called there). Before I upset the movement further, I am sure there was discrimination my youthful naivety didn't perceive.We had a gay kid in our high school class who had transferred from Germany, who we all loved and treated no differently ... I don't even recall a conversation about his sexuality. However I do recall that he was one of the smartest kids in class (living up to stereotype) and made gourmet foil-wrapped sandwiches (more stereotypes).There was another kid, also from Europe, also openly gay. I do not recall anyone bullying him for being gay. I do not recall anyone at supper bringing him extra servings of bratwurst and saying: "Ist das gross genug?" (Is this big enough?)story_article_left1So where does my fear of being thought of as gay come from? In Cape Town, at least five times a day, strangers yell at me: "Awe Rasta!" In Joburg, it's "Jahman!" There is so much love around for merely having dreadlocks. I am constantly being asked for weed. I am not Rastafarian and not a pothead, but I nonetheless just smile and never point out: "Hey, I'm a proud supporter of the Rasta faith but I'm not one myself." (And in brackets add: Not Rasta, for further clarity.)Like Benni with his two mothers, it would seem Vivid Has Two Standards. I realised that pointing out I was not gay was insulting to gay people. It suggests a mentality of gays, that they will take any bone thrown their way, including me.What would be so wrong with being thought of as gay? Would I not be thought of as sophisticated, moneyed, possibly an architect, a law professor, or a music judge? From the examples of late greats David Bowie and Brenda Fassie, have we not learned to move beyond giving a damn about how people categorise us?There will be no more buts. To cure myself of my double standards, and because I let the movement and myself down, I have made a conscious choice that for a full week I will go out of my way to tell people that I am gay.Please note, this exercise is for myself and not meant to cause offence; but I realise some will see this as tantamount to white people painting themselves black for a week...