From survivor to warrior

The joy Campaign is an unlikely name for a campaign associated with rape.

We know the ongoing horror. A rape occurs every 17 seconds in South Africa. Countless cases go unreported.

According to a study done by the Medical Research Council, a quarter of the men interviewed admitted to raping someone. Without exact numbers, it's safe to say there are many traumatised men and women walking our streets.

Charlene Lau has been raped at three different times in her life. As a young child, she was sexually abused by her father. When she was 13, still a virgin, she was gang-raped by a group of older teenage boys. Then a few years ago, when she was 26, a friend locked her in his house and raped her.

''Most women don't talk. Like my family, the coping mechanism is to keep quiet and move on," Lau said.

Recovering from her repeated traumas has been a long process. As a young adult Lau developed bulimia, and at university she lost her mind.

''I went off my rocker. I completely and utterly fell apart. My pain and confusion manifested as insanity. There was no outlet for the pain. It took me the better part of four years to recover from that."

Lau was living and working in East Africa when she met an older man.

''We went to a function together, but on the way to drop me at home, he went to his house instead."

After that incident, Lau moved to Pretoria, away from her family.

''I didn't want to see anybody. I felt empty. There was nothing more to break."

Michelle Smith, a counsellor working for the Jes Foord Foundation , which supports victims in KwaZulu-Natal, said: ''Every healing journey is different. Every rape is different. But most victims of rape suffer from self-blame, loss, a sense of guilt. Women often feel something has been taken away from them."

Recovery can be slow and lonely.

''Rape will never be forgotten, but people get to a point where it no longer affects their daily lives," said Smith.

After a long process of counselling and gentle care from her husband, Lau now feels like a survivor, rather than a victim.

''As a rape survivor I am so tired of feeling like a victim. When do I get to feel empowered? When do I get to feel my joy?" she said.

A few months ago Lau decided to walk from Johannesburg to Cape Town as a way to express her survival, to start a conversation, and ''to encourage other survivors to take responsibility for their healing".

On October 20 she will begin her nine-week journey along the N1.

''The walk is an expression of not being a victim. It's about taking back our lives."

On her website, she says the walk is a way of reconnecting with her joy and, once that is done, ''we can address the rape crisis with courage, compassion, creativity and countless other powerful qualities.

"This puts us back in the driver's seat and makes us more than survivors; it makes us warriors."

For more information about the walk see http://charlenelau. wix.com/thejoycampaign