The Big Read: A fish rots from the head

On this side of the Atlantic, the problems of South Africa look very small.

Yet another American is beheaded by Islamic State in the Syrian desert. Bill Cosby's glorious career is poised to come to a shameful end as more than a dozen women start to get public attention after more than a decade of allegations that he drugged and sexually assaulted them. In a place few people had heard of before, the city of Ferguson in the state of Missouri, and in scenes reminiscent of the civil rights struggle, the National Guard is on stand-by as an angry black community waits to hear whether a white policeman will be indicted for the shooting death of yet another unarmed black youth.

A clearly dejected Barack Obama is being described as "a lame duck president" after his party suffered a massive defeat in the two-year midterm elections for members of Congress. Day after day, the rock star US president who promised his people "change we can believe in" is being lambasted, even talked down to, by the political opposition - with more than a hint of prejudice in the tone of his congressional tormentors.

Load-shedding, festive season crime spikes, mismanaged parastatals and deployees with fake credentials seem a world away. What does bother me, though, is the behaviour of our parliament.

Better-qualified columnists have written about what the EFF-inspired upheavals mean for democracy, and whether the disruptions were the inevitable outcome of what happens when a party with a numerical majority arrogantly bullies its way through any and all ethical, legal and procedural barriers that are there to protect good governance. A seasoned observer of politics on both sides of 1994 made the spine-chilling observation that the last time the riot police stormed into parliament was when Hendrik Verwoerd was stabbed.

My take on the scandal in parliament is educational. What does such disgraceful behaviour mean for the tens of thousands of pupils and university students watching the wall-to-wall coverage of politicians behaving badly?

In a country where lack of civility in public conversation has become the norm - take, for example, the more and more brazen racist provocations from the usual scumbags - this was an unprecedented low point. These politicians are among the same people who want to force schools to adopt oaths of allegiance and enforce codes of conduct. As before, it will not work. Young people take their cue from the behaviour of leaders, whether in private-sector companies, public-service departments, homes, schools or universities. When they see leaders behaving like skollies, they more often than not tend to imitate the same conduct. I've seen this over and over again.

That is why, on some university campuses, it is not enough for students to protest peacefully. They must burn vehicles and tear down offices.

It is rare these days to have a strike of any kind without the looting of shops and turning over of dustbins.

Where did they learn this behaviour? As they say in my other language, 'n vis vrot van die kop af (a fish rots from the head).

This is not a call for perfect leadership; we all have feet of clay. It is a plea for awareness that every act of public behaviour has educational consequences.

In the case of politicians, know that young people look up to you, for now. Many aspire to public duty and their only model of what that might entail is you, and how you behave in televised debates. And, no, switching off the parliamentary television is not the answer; altering public behaviour is.

I plead with you to demonstrate tolerance in the face of provocation. I beg you not to use racist language when you have run out of ideas.

I urge you to keep the police out of parliament - once you step over that line you are playing with fire, for the men in blue are supposed to be impartial, not aligned with the political interests of any one group. I ask you to consider saying sorry.

You would have lost absolutely nothing by allowing MP Reneiloe Mashabela to complete her speech. I appeal to you to use your parliamentary majority generously, because bullying cannot sustain a democracy. And to the opposition, change the tone if not the message.

Above all, remember: the children are watching us.