Making love, not war...

29 May 2015 - 02:22 By Leonie Wagner

South African soldiers aren't just keeping the peace - they're also spreading the love. A new survey has revealed that the SANDF has its fair share of cheaters.AshleyMadison.com, an online dating website that helps married people to have affairs, has ranked the most unfaithful servicemen and women in a survey of 8492 of its military members across South Africa.Clandestine shenanigans seem to be common among some of the men and women tasked with defending the country.And more so in Cape Town than Ladysmith.Noel Biderman, CEO and founder of the website, said: "Time away from family coupled with high-stress working environments can put a lot of pressure on a marriage."Also, people who choose to serve in the defence force tend to be natural risk-takers, making them more likely to take risks in their personal lives."The website has more than 295000 users in South Africa.Its survey among the military members found that 39.4% of men and 43.6% of women registered with the site have affairs with other members of the military.More than half the men and women had affairs to release stress, while just over a third cheated because they were away from their spouses.This dispels the myth that absence makes the heart grow fonder and confirms the notion, "out of sight , out of mind".Biderman explained the infidelity as a coping mechanism and said that the affairs were a way of finding intimacy and emotional connections while away from home.Clinical psychologist Marilyn Davis-Shulman said that infidelity in the military was a form of risk-taking."They are constantly faced with recurring threats; [cheating] makes sense."I don't think it's maliciously intended. Soldiers probably go out of their logical brain and into their trauma brain when they cheat," she said...

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