The mistake we often make is to have parasocial relationships with celebrities — where a person overextends emotional connections with another, while the person on the receiving end of this intense investment is unaware that they even exist.
We see it with superfans, known as stans, like Beyonce’s Beyhive, Marvel and DC’s comic book devotees, as well as sports fans who suffer a special kind of depression when their favourite teams don't fare well.
In the case of stars like Shebeshxt or even Matheba, this can also happen from passive consumers of their content, believing that they’re either completely acerbic to anyone passing them or they would welcome every selfie with a popped bottle of BNG.
The danger of having parasocial relations with stars is that we don’t give them enough room to grow in the vast experiences they face in their fame. However, Shebeshxt, in particular, presents a karmic dilemma for all those with a moral compass hoping that he would pay up for his past sins. While he has not killed anyone, the Bjala hitmaker has harmed many others emotionally.
It is the very same cloud hanging over Hollywood icons like Blake Lively, and Oprah Winfrey and the rollercoaster ride of JK Rowling’s descent into a social media troll.
For Lively, who grew up in Hollywood, her fame in the late 2000s was defined by her method of dressing on red carpets in clothes inspired by her roles, as well as rivalries with co-stars. She received quite a lot of backlash this year following her distasteful approach to a movie about domestic violence, promoting her beauty brand on red carpets and feuding with co-star Justin Baldoni.
THANGO NTWASA | Shebeshxt, Beyonce, Bonang – celebs are not your friends
The mistake we often make is to have parasocial relationships with celebrities
Image: Facebook/Shebehsxt
In an event that was fodder for viral internet flames, Bonang Matheba would stir a furore among fans and foes when one of her devotees seated next to her at a restaurant asked the TV personality for a picture.
“Eat your lunch, sweetie,” was the response the fan would receive from their idol.
Social media users went into a frenzy. Was she having a bad day? Is she the only star who has done it?
All the questions came up for me during a conversation with colleagues this week over Shebeshxt and the mourning of his daughter. The question whether there was consistency in him being a bad boy who was distraught came up and one resolute issue stood out: we do not know anything about who celebrities are.
The local rapper was met with tragedy a few months ago when he was involved in a car accident that claimed the life of his daughter. Since that fateful night, we would see headlines of the star turn from his violent outbursts to moments cementing the memory of his child.
Image: Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for Parkwood
Image: Kristy Sparow/Getty Images for L'Oreal Paris
The mistake we often make is to have parasocial relationships with celebrities — where a person overextends emotional connections with another, while the person on the receiving end of this intense investment is unaware that they even exist.
We see it with superfans, known as stans, like Beyonce’s Beyhive, Marvel and DC’s comic book devotees, as well as sports fans who suffer a special kind of depression when their favourite teams don't fare well.
In the case of stars like Shebeshxt or even Matheba, this can also happen from passive consumers of their content, believing that they’re either completely acerbic to anyone passing them or they would welcome every selfie with a popped bottle of BNG.
The danger of having parasocial relations with stars is that we don’t give them enough room to grow in the vast experiences they face in their fame. However, Shebeshxt, in particular, presents a karmic dilemma for all those with a moral compass hoping that he would pay up for his past sins. While he has not killed anyone, the Bjala hitmaker has harmed many others emotionally.
It is the very same cloud hanging over Hollywood icons like Blake Lively, and Oprah Winfrey and the rollercoaster ride of JK Rowling’s descent into a social media troll.
For Lively, who grew up in Hollywood, her fame in the late 2000s was defined by her method of dressing on red carpets in clothes inspired by her roles, as well as rivalries with co-stars. She received quite a lot of backlash this year following her distasteful approach to a movie about domestic violence, promoting her beauty brand on red carpets and feuding with co-star Justin Baldoni.
Image: Brad Barket/Getty Images for STARZ
Image: Wiki
Image: Getty Images/ File photo
Oprah has been criticised for her interview style that led to many questioning whether she was unearthing truths or taking advantage of her guests to boost viewership numbers. This is the same fate for other daytime TV icons like Dr Phil, whose methods are reductive, overly moralistic and unproductive. Oprah’s name has also been sullied by her rumoured involvement with Jeffrey Epstein following critique from stars like 50 Cent, who felt she only cared about confronting black sex offenders.
Much like Oprah and Lively, Rowling has benefited from young audiences who helped build a once-infallible brand, thanks to the success of the Harry Potter series. This aged as well as the potent potions in her book since she turned her transphobia into a marketable opportunity — so much so that Warner Bros, who owns the rights to the Harry Potter movie franchise, are being rumoured to buy Rowling out since she owns the rights to the names of the characters.
Shebeshxt is met with a similar brand crisis. How do passive consumers and committed fans hold him accountable? How do they empathise in his time of need? Will that empathy run out should he regress into behaviours that have earned him fame and fortune?
Celebrities are not our friends, and quite frankly they are not our enemies either.
It becomes important, as a society that constantly consumes media, whether we want to or not, to draw a line when it comes to building ideas about who these stars are. Not only do we rob ourselves of the opportunity to engage them with discernment, but we also rob them of the opportunity to be honest in moments when they need to react to real issues as people and not personas.
READ MORE:
TIMELINE | Ryan & Blake vs the world
The fleeting influence of SA parliamentary red carpets
'I miss you every second of my life': Shebeshxt tattoos late daughter’s face on leg
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