The prize for the past year's most annoying ''thing" doesn't go to anything food related. The award has to go to colouring-in books for grown-ups. What sick mind thought this one up? Of course, there are runners-up in the food field. I'm hoping that next year we can sort out the irritations that bedevil the following list.1Artisanal everything: Can people please be stopped from applying this word randomly to anything slightly less industrialised than Coca-Cola? The dictionary defines artisanal as ''pertaining to a high quality or distinctive product made in small quantities, usually by hand or using traditional methods". Most of the stuff bearing the label doesn't qualify, which is pretty unfair to the stuff made with blood, sweat and tears, which does.2Hand-made: Under what circumstances does the fact that something's hand-made actually count? And does it make the product better? More ethical? Hand-cut chips for example; well who the hell cares? Use a knife, use a hand, use a guillotine. Just cut the damn things, I really don't need to know how. Unless it's something properly interesting of course. How about ''cut using telepathy" or ''cut using only a blunt pen-knife blade, like James Franco in 127 Hours" or maybe '''hand-cut by hands wearing plastic gloves bought from a huge factory in China". It's all nonsense.3Kettle-fried: Ha. Don't make me laugh. The type of vessel used for deep-frying is irrelevant. Kettle, pot, deep-fryer - why are they telling us? Could it simply be to distract us from the fact that these artistically cut chips in their vintage vessel are fried in the same cruddy, chemically extracted vegetable oil that all other chips are fried in? Er, let me think..4Flavoured beer: Who could have seen this one coming? Chocolate beer and bacon beer are the worst offenders. Please let this nightmare end quickly.5Gluten intolerance: It's the new thing! Everyone in a certain income bracket has suddenly developed the ailment. This is all a lot of fun, and doubtless increases your social standing, but when every dog and his uncle is claiming gluten intolerance, it makes life quite crap for the people who actually are intolerant, and are mocked along with the pretenders. For the best comment on the matter, check out ''How to be Gluten Intolerant" on YouTube. And while you're there, look at ''How to Become a Vegetarian". Fantastic...