We are hearing a great deal about the relationship between fathers and sons. Two celebrities, rock star Bruce Springsteen and British TV newsman Jeremy Paxman, have published autobiographies in which they refer disparagingly to their relationship with their fathers. In Born to Run, Springsteen tells of his father's rages and his disapproval of his son. This left him feeling disengaged and emotionally contained as he tried to protect himself from such monumental rejection.Similarly, in A Life in Questions, Paxman writes of his resentment - even hatred at times - for his father, who had always been distant towards his son and who appeared to show no interest at all in his life when, as an adult, the broadcaster tracked him down in Australia.Paternal rejection can deeply affect all children, both sons and daughters. Ronald Rohner at the University of Connecticut claims that behaviour problems, delinquency, depression and psychological maladjustment are more closely linked to fathers' rejection than to that of mothers.Sometimes, paternal rejection can seem to have a positive side. Boys who are rejected by their fathers may become high achievers. However, their achievements often feel hollow to them. Unlike successful men who grew up feeling self-confident and enjoy putting themselves forward because they knew paternal praise and love, those who have been rejected by their father may force themselves into the limelight to gain the recognition and praise they never had as children. Then, because that recognition cannot fill their childhood void, they continue anxiously to push themselves harder and ever harder.Add to this the lack of self-confidence and emotional instability sons in particular feel in the face of paternal rejection, and a bleak picture emerges.No one knows for sure why father approval is so powerful: perhaps, in the West, it is assumed that mothers will nurture and support, but when it comes to fathers it feels like there's more of a choice - so their attention can feel more of a treasure when it's received.Of course, when it comes to sons and fathers, the father is a role model, too - the person they most want to be like and whose approval means most.Certainly, positive paternal involvement has been shown to have a significant effect on children's mental wellbeing.Charlie Lewis at Lancaster University and Michael Lamb at the National Institute for Health found that paternal involvement during childhood was a better predictor of adult psychological adjustment than was maternal involvement.What does positive paternal involvement mean?Fathers who are positively involved in child rearing are equal partners when it comes to setting and enforcing house rules, and at the same time allowing appropriate freedoms. They take time to listen fully to their children and their children feel close to them.This approach is best achieved when parents work together, when mothers support fathers rather than when one parent takes full responsibility. Such collaborative effort isn't always easy, but the children benefit hugely. - ©The Telegraph..