Lonely Christmas for mother of murdered children

25 December 2018 - 10:00 By Nonkululeko Njilo
Andiswa Ndibi says she often questions God since her two children, nine-year-old Elam and eight-year-old Muzi, were murdered, allegedly by a former lover after their relationship ended. 'What did i do to deserve this?' she asks.
Andiswa Ndibi says she often questions God since her two children, nine-year-old Elam and eight-year-old Muzi, were murdered, allegedly by a former lover after their relationship ended. 'What did i do to deserve this?' she asks.
Image: Thapelo Morebudi / The Sunday Times

The mother of two children who were murdered allegedly by a former lover of 18 months, says her Christmas will be lonely without her little ones running around the house.

Andiswa Ndibi, 33, who has spent the past 10 years' Christmas festivities at their family home in Tshepisong on the West Rand, said this year would be different because she had had to move out of the house.

"I couldn’t stay in that house anymore. Besides being scared, I didn’t want to be constantly reminded of the children when they are no more."

Ndibi said her relatives used to visit at this time of the year, and they would prepare lunch or have a braai.

"My kids, together with those of my relatives, would be dressed in their new clothes, running in and outside the house happily," she recalled.

Choice Assorted biscuits were her children's favourite, which they ate with other kids in the yard.

Ndibi said her biggest regret was bringing a man she trusted into her life. 

"Perhaps if I did not allow him to have a relationship with my children, they would still be alive," she told TimesLIVE, her eyes teary.

The children‚ Elam‚ a girl aged nine‚ and Muzi‚ a boy aged eight, were kidnapped while playing outside their home on September 14 shortly after they had returned from school. Their mother said she had prepared them their favourite meal of bread and eggs, not knowing that it would be the last time she would make food for them. 

Ndibi recalled how the man had on several occasions indicated that he had wanted to kill her because he could not accept that their relationship was over. 

A month later, the children's bodies were found buried in a shallow grave in Slovoville, 10km from their home.     

Ndibi’s former lover, whose name is known to TimesLIVE, had been on the run since the bodies were discovered. On November 7, the man, aged 47, was apprehended by police in Mpumalanga. He is facing double charges of murder and kidnapping and is expected to appear in the Kagiso Magistrate's Court on January 16.

He cannot be named because a sexual offence charge might be added to the charges against him.

Gauteng safety MEC Sizakele Nkosi-Malobnane said: "We are still investigating if there were no other crimes committed against the children, particularly the girl child."

Speaking about her life three months after the tragic ordeal, Ndibi said: "I still think of them and what they would be doing right now. Seeing children their ages is a constant reminder of how much I miss them.

"I have sleepless nights and bad dreams all the time. I do not think I will ever live a normal life again. Sometimes I question God, what did I ever do to deserve this?"

Ndibi said her family was supportive but she was not yet ready to face world. "I stay indoors all the time. I am not ready to face people – they talk a lot."

Ndibi has just one goal for 2019: "I want to heal. I am trying, but it is really difficult."


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