Another woman in the running for ANC presidency - but it's not who you expect

Evita Bezuidenhout‚ the alter ego of comedian Pieter Dirk Uys‚ announced on Tuesday that she would be joining the race for the top spot of ANC president.

The attractive grandmother - who admitted to having voted for the ruling National Party during Apartheid - stated at a press briefing in Durban that she would make herself available for presidency of the party at the 54th National ANC Conference‚ scheduled to take place in December. She swept in to the briefing chatting on the phone to ANC secretary-general Gwede Mantashe‚ dressed to kill in a stylish gown made from a red shweshwe print. The vibrantly red frock featured the face of the late Archbishop Denis Hurley within the design.

Director of the Hurley Centre‚ Raymond Perrier‚ said that he could not think of another occasion where a Catholic archbishop had been presented so glamorously.

Explaining why she had made the momentous decision to enter the presidential race‚ the former ambassador of the fictional homeland Bapetikosweti said: “There are currently two women in the race. They need help. There are a cluster of powerful men already choosing their presidential Boeings from the brochure. They need to be brought down to earth.”

Bezuidenhout said she had been a member of the ANC since 2012.

“So why am I in the ANC? Some have said seeing Evita Bezuidenhout in the ANC is like seeing Angela Merkel as a Greek bank manager.

“I am there because I was challenged by my three Barack Obama-beige grandchildren. They said: ‘Gogo? What are you going to do to protect democracy?’ So that is my challenge and commitment to the future of all our young people.”

She added that the list of candidates for the position of ANC president grows daily.

“The list is a who’s who of what was‚ what is and what shouldn’t be. It has become our version of ’Idols’.” Bezuidenhout told the media that she was not necessarily looking for votes.

“I’m going to tell you the things you don’t want to hear. Let us unleash a new armed struggle against state capture‚ corruption and fakeness‚ with the Constitution as our weapon of choice‚” she said.

Evita Bezuidenhout has been a household name in South Africa for over 35 years and is commonly referred to as “the most famous white woman in South Africa”.