Former journalist Piet Rampedi, the proud daddy of SA’s most high-profile fake news fiasco, has apologised for doubling down before decupleting from reality entirely and finally blaming his own negligence and gullibility on a shadowy conspiracy by the state. I really wish he hadn’t.
On Tuesday evening, the carefully-worded notapology was revealed by News24, after Independent Media’s editor-in-chief, Aneez Salie, opted to stay silent on the issue.
Personally, I found this a genuinely shocking twist: I had no idea that Independent had an editor-in-chief, and had always assumed its content was selected by Iqbal Surve, firing champagne corks at a large rotating wheel on which were scribbled things like “Go Team NDZ!” and “Mom packs Savannah into daughter’s school lunch!”
Explaining that the alleged parents had “no reason to lie” to him, Rampedi explained that he “never demanded documentary proof of the pregnancy”, since “there was nothing to investigate, I thought”.
Yep, just a woman who had undergone no fertility treatment, getting pregnant at the age of 37 with eight babies, or possibly 10. You know, that old chestnut.
“However,” added a heroically hedging Piet, “judging by the sudden turn of events and the reaction from the government and our detractors, I was wrong.”
That “sudden turn of events” was, of course, the intrusion of reality into the parallel universe in which Piet and many of his colleagues live, one in which people who question obviously dubious stories are “detractors” rather than, oh I don’t know, people who can read for comprehension.
Yep, just a woman who had undergone no fertility treatment getting pregnant at the age of 37 with eight babies, or possibly 10. You know, that old chestnut.
The main gist of Rampedi’s letter, however, was an apology for having done “reputational damage” to “the group, the company and my colleagues in general”, adding that his story “provided detractors with an opportunity to cast aspersions on the professional integrity not only of myself but also my colleagues in the group”.
This, however, is where things get weird for me.
I understand why journalists apologise. Although I don’t consider myself a reporter, I too have had to apologise in the past for getting my facts wrong. Just a few months ago Jacques Pauw, one of SA’s most respected journalists, fabricated an entire story out of nothing but skaam-kwaad.
But as I see it, Piet Rampedi has nothing to apologise for, because he’s done nothing wrong — at least not by the standards of the company he works for.
If Independent Media were a reputable media organisation it might be a different story. But by refusing to sign SA’s press code, and by parading Surve across its front pages with the regularity and lack of irony of Pyongyang’s Despot-Fancier Weekly, the company has been very honest about what it is: an enormous selfie for Surve, with whatever infotainment or political conspiracy will drag eyeballs onto that selfie.
In other words, Rampedi’s apology is as bizarre as Steven Spielberg apologising for telling us that there’s a little extraterrestrial gardener who can make bicycles fly.
Rampedi owes us nothing, because neither he nor Surve ever promised us anything except dinner and a show.
As long as we paid.
Would you like to comment on this article?
Sign up (it's quick and free) or sign in now.
Please read our Comment Policy before commenting.