THE WORLD COMES TO MZANSI
From two top supermodels to the biggest star in the world, and a stately former US president to the stars of the year's most-talked about flick, the local social whirl was spoilt for choice when it came to top international stars popping into Mzansi to add a dose of Hollywood glam.
The year started with Brit supermodel Jourdan Dunn turning up at Polish billionaire Sebastian Kulczyk's party at a lavish pad in Bakoven, Cape Town, while catwalk compatriot Naomi Campbell made two trips here for her duties as one of the hosts of the Global Citizen music fest.
Naomi introduced a new word - "Amandala" - to the local vocabulary after mispronouncing "Amandla!" on stage at the December concert, but it was superstar Beyoncé who stole the show.
Then drama ensued when concert-goers were left stranded at the mercy of criminals outside FNB Stadium.
In February, Lupita Nyong'o was on the red carpet at the South African premiere of Marvel blockbuster Black Panther, while in November it was the turn of the actor behind the Wakanda baddie, Michael B Jordan, to show up for the second instalment of the boxing franchise Creed.
In between, there was another visit by talk show queen Oprah Winfrey, Barack Obama inspired us with his delivery of the 2018 Nelson Mandela lecture, and the holder of the world's most-followed Twitter account, Katy Perry, wowed us with an energetic concert tour.
ODDEST RED-CARPET MOMENT
Picture the scene: you're standing in the media pen at of one of the world's blingest music events, the MTV Europe Music Awards in Bilboa, Spain, when a flame-haired actress comes barrelling towards you for no apparent reason.
The actress, Lindsay Lohan, is known for her odd behaviour, so this really wasn't such a surprise.
Turns out she had spotted the media sign stating the country of origin of the vlogger on my right and was inspired to let him know "I love New Zealand!" before running off again.
Mmkay...
THE CREAM OF THE CROP
Baffled by the often B-, C- and D-grade personalities event organisers invite to their shindigs, I decided to take measures into my own hands with the introduction of the A-Lister luncheon.
The intimate occasion at Melrose Arch restaurant The Orient was graced by names who deserve the "A-List" moniker, including Basetsana Kumalo and her award-winning businesswoman sister, Johanna Mukoki; top couturier Gavin Rajah; singer and activist LeAnne Dlamini; and Colin Coleman of Goldman Sachs SA and his model partner, Nerina Labuschagne.
They were joined by others I felt deserve to join this ultimate social club: comedian Loyiso Madinga, who has become one of SA's most sought-after MCs; and artist Nelson Makamo, who had his biggest international exhibition in New York in September and can now list Oprah as one of his growing list of high-wattage clients.
And as for my pick for the year's It Girl? Telegenic DJ and broadcaster Lerato Kganyago, who landed the year's most coveted gig as host of the first local instalment of fashion hit Project Runway, and picked up awards for best presenter at the South African Film and Television Awards and most stylish media personality at the South African Style Awards.
TREVOR'S QUIP TRIP
You can't fault our man in Hollywood, Trevor Noah, for shining the spotlight on the South African comedy scene.
But our most successful entertainment export after Charlize Theron crossed the line when he used the death of the Mother of the Nation, Winnie Madikizela-Mandela, for a cheap laugh.
It was just a few days after Mama Winnie's death when Trevor got up on stage during a recording of his new M-Net show, Nation Wild, and pointed out that from the age of 80 we should all be thankful to wake up with the realisation: "Wow, I am still alive."
While the host of The Daily Show did recover from his faux pas, the quip left the audience scratching their heads.
A LAVISH NIP AND TUCK
Thanks to the obsession with looking as Instagrammable as possible, the business of Botox has become a lucrative industry.
But the launch of what is euphemistically called an aesthetic centre isn't something you'd expect me to cover for the pages of this column.
Well, in 2018 I attended the ribbon cuttings of two such beauty emporiums - Dr Anushka Reddy's Featherbrooke Hotel & Spa in June and the Dr P Aesthetic Lifestyle Centre a month earlier.
The latter was a particularly lavish offering - but when you're Portia Gumede, wife of business tycoon Robert Gumede, it should come as no surprise.
It was held at Hyde Park shopping centre, and it was clear no expense was spared for the Gavin Rajah-produced occasion, with the event venue transformed into an enchanted garden and guests dressed to the nines.
The night marked the last time I saw someone I will miss dearly on the social scene: our late environment minister, Edna Molewa, who proved she had the gift of the gab, entertaining us with a laugh-a-minute speech.
The lavish feast was perhaps the most A-Lister worthy meal of the year: a seared chilli and black sesame salmon and sashimi starter; refreshing pineapple, orange and ginger foam palate cleanser; and a choice of either melt-in-your-mouth beef fillet with red wine and port reduction, or parmesan-crumbed chicken breasts stuffed with mushroom, feta and thyme; with vegetables flecked with gold dust.
Dessert was a light lemon mousse with white chocolate and coconut sphere, with ginger gel, and individual cheese spreads to tuck into.
A TRIUMVIRATE OF POLITICAL WIVES
Although their partners faced varying degrees of success in 2018 - with one cementing his political standing, another moving sideways and the last stranded in the political desert - three political wives added a much-needed dose of glamour and charm to the social whirl this year.
The triumvirate - Thembeka Cele, the gorgeous wife of police minister Bheki Cele; Nozuko Mbalula, the wife of former minister of razzmatazz Fikile Mbalula; and Norma Gigaba, the wife of bumbling former minister Malusi Gigaba - looked a dream wherever they showed up, from the opening of parliament to the launch of a fancy Italian fridge.
UN-NATTY DRESSER
If truth be told, what menfolk turn up wearing at social dos is often unmemorable.
But the same cannot be said of the wardrobe of jeweller Kevin Friedman, who is no wallflower.
Take the loud orange floral suit he sported to the birthday bash for Carolyn Steyn, the wife of insurance king Douw Steyn, at their palatial mansion at Steyn City.
Let's just say that Kevin's NikNaks outfit is proof that orange is not the new black when it comes to sartorial elegance.
PUBLIC UNCOUPLINGS
They were the epitome of couple goals, but sadly two of the social whirl's hottest couples both called the whole thing off in 2018.
First, actress Nomzamo Mbatha and hunky sometime TV presenter Maps Maponyane apparently called it quits back in May (although they never actually officially confirmed they were an item in the first place).
But nothing could prepare us for the news that Tebogo "Proverb" Thekisho and Liesl Laurie had parted ways, with the rapper-cum-TV host and his ex-Miss SA ex going so far as deleting all their loved-up pics from their Instagram feeds.
Ouch!
NOMZAMO'S YEAR
With her name loosely translated as "Mother of All Endeavours", it's not surprising that, break-up or not, this was Nomzamo Mbatha's year.
Not only did the actress complete her accountancy degree at the University at Cape Town, she also added a few more endorsements to her belt - and got a delicate soft peach meets pink rose named after her. Yes, things certainly have come up roses in 2018 for the perky personality.
A SPARKLING NEW VENUE
To find a new venue that's centrally located and not a concrete box is no ordinary feat.
And when its sprawling grounds are filled with sculptures from some of the country's finest artists set in prime Sandton real estate, you have to take your hat off to the organisers of the reveal of the Makro Festive Liquor catalogue.
Add a dash of titillation with the mansion's owner being Africa's wealthiest "defence trader", Ivor Ichikowitz, and throw in a kick-ass guest list and this was certainly one of the year's top shindigs.
NO FROTH AT SOAPY AWARDS
An awards ceremony featuring an unknown "superstar" who lip-syncs on stage, where you don't get to keep the trophy and where envelopes are swapped?
Ouch, the 2018 Royalty Soapie Awards deserve the gong for this year's night to remember for all the wrong reasons.
Held at Emperors Palace, this event had all the hallmarks of a badly shot telenovela.
Things started well with an interesting take on D'banj's hit Oliver Twist before funnyman Mpho Popps welcomed us. But from there it was all downhill: the first award recipients were asked to hand back their trophies after they'd taken their seats... and one of the night's performers, Steven Lee, visibly lip-synced on stage.
Yup, this was a night so messy that no amount of soap suds could clean up the froth.
BEST DRESSED
No one showed an impeccable sense of style all year round, but two of my favourite outfits belong to artist Billie Zangewa, who wore a unique Gideon shift at the South African Style Awards, and Masechaba Ndlovu's striking red and black modern incarnation of traditional Xhosa wear at the Fairlady Santam Women of the Future Awards...