#MensConference: Full Valentine's Day 'escape plan' revealed
Events as they've been unfolding in the run up to SA's fictitious Men's Conference that's been trending on social media
The hilarious Valentine's escape plan known as #MensConference has been trending on Twitter and many men are delighted. The fictitious conference will be taking place from February 14 to 16, strategically organised so that men can escape their Valentine's Day obligations. The location has remained a top secret but somehow men have been able to purchase their tickets.
#MensConference
— Tumi Sole (@tumisole) February 13, 2019
Akudlalwa!
No tickets, no entry!
๐ธ@LastLetta_Ziie pic.twitter.com/0Qfvg036tS
An itinerary that has been circulated provides a little insight into what will be happening during the three days. Malusi Gigaba and rapper Emtee are set to host a "size doesn't matter" competition, while former President Jacob Zuma will give a talk on polygamy and Julius Malema will inspire attendees with his tales of weight loss.
Unfortunately, DJ Fresh had to disappoint fans after his lady forbade him attending, but DJ Tira's announcement that he will be turning up the volume at the after-party saved the day.
She said NO, when I asked for VISA to attend the #MensConference... apologies for any inconvenience caused, gents!! I am certain @moflavadj will rep our session well!!! #MensValentinesConference pic.twitter.com/6PRnDvLTeW
— DJ Fresh (Big Dawg) (@DJFreshSA) February 13, 2019
Catch me at the afterparty ๐บ #MensConference Chikichikichaaaa pic.twitter.com/1C9iaiFjeZ
— Makoya Van Best (@DJTira) February 13, 2019
Despite attempts by disgruntled individuals to prevent the conference from happening, the organisers were able to overcome all difficulties and the venue was ready for the men to gather by the time Valentine's Day arrived.
I am reliable informed that the #Mens_Conference venue scheduled to take place on 14 February has been burnt to ashes. Those men who have sustained burn injuries have be taken to the nearest MENS CLINIC. These arsonist must be brought to book. pic.twitter.com/2gzwQecaXM
— Mfanafuthi Biyela (@Phathizwe_RSA) February 13, 2019
#MensConference2019 #MensConference pic.twitter.com/dQt9ABO9W8
— George Ash (@Thobbs_GT) February 14, 2019
The conference gathered so much support that, Chris Mpehle, head of organising, even welcomed a British delegation and comrades from Lesotho could be seen making their way to the venue during the early hours of Valentine's Day.
International guests representing the British delegation have arrived early for check in. They were received by myself and a few other members of the NEC's portfolio organising committee. #MensConference #MensValentinesConference #MensConference2019 pic.twitter.com/RInyC5v6Wt
— Head of Organising, Men's National Conference. (@ChrisMpehle) February 13, 2019
Our brothers from Lesotho have finally arrived #MensConference pic.twitter.com/9cpTb27C1b
— Donga luka Mavuso (@mshengulala) February 14, 2019
As was to be expected, the men racing to make their way to the conference caused havoc on the roads.
#MensConference EXPECT DELAYS due to high traffic volumes towards the venue pic.twitter.com/OTAxJjy6V3
— Rob Beezy (@TrafficSA) February 13, 2019
Dude en route to the #MensConference2019 and forgot he didnโt switch off his cellphone and take out the SIM card! Made the bus turn around on the freeway ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ #MensConference pic.twitter.com/8NfDSZ91GA
— Trish Freeman (@trishfreeman24) February 13, 2019
Luckily for those running late, main man Chris extended the registration period.
By the powers vested in me, I officially announce an extention on registration. We understand that many of you are travelling & so you have until 6:30 tomorrow morning to complete your registration at which point the venue will close for us to begin our work. #MensConference https://t.co/ICXKTzHuDW
— Head of Organising, Men's National Conference. (@ChrisMpehle) February 13, 2019
Unfortunately for the latecomers, they missed the jubilant arrival of the main speakers and, it would seem, a surprise address by former President Robert Mugabe.
Our main speaker has just arrived, Mr Malusi Gigaba #MensConference2019 #MensConference pic.twitter.com/V62aR1u6rc
— MrFerrari (@InnocentF1) February 14, 2019
Former President Cde Robert Mugabe almost left everyone in tears at the Men's conference after delivering a speech, "How your spouse can mess up your job." Emotional indeed
— Dr. Wellence Mujuru (@WellenceMujuru) February 14, 2019
๐ข๐ข #mensconference2019
Some men (we dare say very few) missed the memo, skipped out on the conference and bought their ladies the obligatory roses and chocolates for Valentine's Day. Others subsequently found love in the run-up to the much-anticipated event and attempted to sell their tickets.
Kante what happened to #mensconference ๐๐พโโ๏ธ I guess the wise ones have stayed away ๐คฃ๐คฃ๐คฃ pic.twitter.com/B22TGZHgHM
— Cathy Mohlahlana (@CathyMohlahlana) February 14, 2019
Who wants tickets to the Men's conference,I am selling mine,I am in love bafwethu.
— Jah Vele! ๐ฟ๐ฆ (@phethohlubi3) February 13, 2019
Most men, however, have taken to Twitter to express the joy they've found in the Men's Conference, calling for an end of the commodification of love.
Whoever that came up with the Imaginary #MensConference, deserves a Nobel Peace Prize. He is a History Maker!
— Mr. Tshepiso Mahika (@Tshepiso_Mahika) February 14, 2019
Comrades, no one must be left behind. Pick up your fellow brothers on the way , Unity Maqabane... letโs fight to end the commodification of love #MensConference pic.twitter.com/QFulRZpk2C
— Modisakgotla ยฎ๏ธ (@Nape_MM) February 13, 2019
With the men away and nothing left to be done, after tantrums and fits of rage, the women have remembered: if you can't beat them ... join them.
What's this ๐๐๐ #MensConference ๐๐๐ pic.twitter.com/pSEll7ObSG
— Figo๐ (@mogapi_7) February 13, 2019
WATCH | Social media users have declared a #MensConference. It will be held this Valentineโs Day, February 14 2019, and the tweets will have you in stitches. Subscribe to TimesLIVE here: https://www.youtube.com/user/TimesLive