From lapping at luxury to schlepping with the local schleb set, I cut short my Cape Town visit to head to the 15th anniversary in Africa for entertainment channel E!
The network, which gave the world Keeping Up With The Kardashians, held the party at the new Alice & Fifth in Sandton. I arrived just as one of the night's stars, Minnie Dlamini-Jones turned up in a plethora of pink, from her shoes to her rok and gloves.
A peck on the cheek and the TV presenter heads off to traipse the red carpet. I slip inside as waiters proffer canapés ranging from gold-dusted sushi and oysters to deboned chicken on microgreens and chicken liver pâté on bruschetta wafers.Guests stream in and soon the whole place feels like a sweaty nightclub.In my suit I almost envy Khanyi Mbau's little brother, Lasizwe, for being brave enough to let it all hang out in his white leotard, sneakers and black blazer finished off with a diamanté choker.
Not!
In walks Nigerian superstar D'Banj and the woman he was rumoured to have once dated, Bonang Matheba.
They gladly accept my request to pose for a pic and Bonang's manager looks a little frazzled.
On to another part of the club, and the Oliver Twist hitmaker, who is wearing a long gold brocade coat, finds sanctuary in a private enclave when the night's host, Kat Sinivasan, turns up.
"Thank God I didn't wear a suit," he says, spotting Kat's gold brocade jacket.
Someone who looks chic in her suit is Zinhle Jiyane, she who is loved up again with rapper AKA, who'd previously ditched her for Bonang.
I ask DJ Zinhle if she planned on saying hello to her baby's daddy's ex.
"Yes, I will say hello. I will say: 'You look beautiful,'" says the DJ, whose self-help book is aptly titledMeeting Your Power.We get to see the channel's new campaign, Love E! Live E!, between performances by Shekhinah and Cassper Nyovest. There is also a bit where awards are handed out to folk like Bonang, actress and activist Nomzamo Mbatha and designer Gert-Johan Coetzee.You will want to know about the frocks, and it's a toss-up between Bontle Modiselle and Bonang as the night's best dressed. Lasizwe might have looked better in a clown suit, was Minnie mining a pink Jessica Rabbit, and will Nomzamo please explain why there was a feather duster peeping out of the top of her gown?..