I'm totally committed to this adulting thing, except when no-one's looking

About 90% of my existence is about being grown-up: the other 10% is spent on booze, porn and eating cheesecake-flavoured ice cream out of the tub

27 October 2019 - 00:00 By

According to PanSALB (the Pan South African Language Board), SA's term of the year is "Zondo commission". What's that I hear? A collective yawn from Kakamas to Musina? I thought so too.

Look, I think deputy chief Justice Raymond Zondo is an upstanding fellow with more integrity and class than the entire cabinet, ANC NEC, DA federal council, Old Mutual and Steinhoff boards and their grandparents combined. Besides, he has a baritone that puts Barry White and Mike from Boyz II Men to shame. If I saw him approaching in the basement parking of Menlyn Park shopping mall, I'd whisk the missus away to avoid out-of-season ovulation...

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