A gentleman should remove his FitBit before sex
Wearing an activity tracker while doing the deed is a real turn off, writes Rebecca Reid
It has been said that the mark of a gentleman is one who takes his weight on his elbows. I'm sad to say that because it's 2017 and we've lost sight of all that is good about the world, we may well need to add another clause to that maxim, one which explains that a gentleman is also obliged to remove his FitBit before doing the deed.
How many of us have had the experience of getting between the sheets with someone, only to realise that we're witnessing a solo show? Selfishness in bed is, I'm sad to say, all too common. And if things weren't bad enough? Lo and behold, there's another way to ruin what should be a mutually gratifying pursuit. The FitBit.
For the uninitiated, a FitBit is an activity tracker that measures your physical movement over the course of a day, telling you what your heart rate is, how well you slept and how many steps you've taken.
While many FitBit fans are perfectly inoffensive, there is also something of an epidemic of FitBit-bores. You'll see them marching ostentatiously on the spot while they wait for the office kettle to boil, or trotting up and down the train platform in the morning, as if an extra 45 seconds of movement a day is going to stave off heart disease.
But what's worse than a FitBit bore who wears their tracker to the gym? A FitBit bore who wears it during sex.
One such bore is renowned cricketer Andrew "Freddie" Flintoff, who admitted last week that he likes to wear his Fitbit in bed because it "makes him try harder". Oh Freddie. Poor, sweet Freddie. And, more importantly, poor Freddie's wife Rachael, who made it very clear that she hates the FiBit.
"Things are happening and then your husband's wrist is flashing telling him his heartbeat and how hard he's working. It's really wrong. It's putting me off though. It's like you're seeing it as another training session rather than anything else. It's really not nice," said Rachael.
•Who's he satisfying, you or his FitBit? Of course it's admirable to want to become a better lover if the intention is to give more pleasure to the person you are in bed with.
Being good in bed is making sure that the other person enjoys him or herself.
It means ensuring that their pleasure is real and abundant, and that they feel exhilarated and satiated afterwards.
So please, guys everywhere, leave the FitBit on the bedside table until you're finished, because none of those are things can be measured by a wristwatch. - The Daily Telegraph
• This article was originally published in The Times.