Padkos, playlists & strange stories: the ingredients of a great road-trip
As the holiday season looms and families prepare their cars for some great cross-country trek, Sunday Times staffers reflect on their past road-trip experiences
YOLISA MKELE, FEATURES WRITER
My favourite road trip ever was one where we tried (and failed) to style ourselves as South African cowboys and drive through the "badlands". Our route took us from Joburg to Bloemfontein to Clocolan, Lady Grey, Molteno, Graaff-Reinet and back.
I'm a fan of padkos - biltong, Red Bull and anything greasy enough to stress out the owner of the car. Stops at the local Spurs are also mandatory.
As for the soundtrack, travelling with people with diverse music tastes, you discover things like Russian space disco. You can never go wrong with Earth, Wind and Fire, Rick Ross and a bit of French electronic duo Justice.
Done and dusted or going nowhere slowly? Like my ex-girlfriend used to say, "Let's get this over with."
My weirdest road-trip experience was when I stayed over with some buddies at a place that had four adjacent outdoor baths. It was weird, climbing in, wearing nothing but a cowboy hat, holding a glass of whisky, and hoping not to catch a stray glimpse of man gristle.
My dream ride is a Jaguar F Pace.
My dream road trip would take forever but it's a trip from Cape Town to the northernmost point in Europe.
THOMAS FALKINER, MOTORING EDITOR
As a motoring journalist I've been on many road trips but one that stands out was a five-day romp through the Eastern Cape "badlands" in a Porsche Panamera Sport Turismo. It was a jol because I was driving on roads I'd never been on before and staying in towns I'd never been to before.
I always pack some biltong. It's easy to eat one-handed. I'm also partial to a good Wimpy burger, by the way.
I've got 37-gigabytes of music on my iPhone, so that's a lot of music at my fingertips. I usually just put that on shuffle. If I get tired of music then I'll put on an audiobook - usually something by Cormac McCarthy or Bret Easton Ellis. Stephen King's short stories work well too.
I'm not one to meander - I like to get the trip done as quickly as possible.
My weirdest road trip was the time I drove up to the Kalahari Desert Speedweek in 2012. It was held on Hakskeen Pan up in the Northern Cape, right next to the Namibian border. We only got to Upington after dark. After some dinner we then hit the road up to the pan, which was probably about a two-hour drive through some of the most desolate landscape our country has to offer. It was straight out of a David Lynch movie.
My dream road trip would be driving through California and Nevada. I'd love to cruise down the Extraterrestrial Highway and Route 50 - "The Loneliest Road in America".
PETA SCOP, SUB-EDITOR
My favourite road trip ever was the time, after spending a week in the Kalahari Transfrontier Park, we couldn't find a place to stay in Upington for a night, so we drove all the way back to Joburg under a full moon, on an almost empty road.
For music, my parents always had home-made tapes. Top of the Pops. Tom Jones. Shirley Bassey, Engelbert Humperdinck. Now we often drive in silence. Or else it's Nick Cave. Bob Dylan. Leonard Cohen. Lots of Pink Floyd. Nina Simone. John Lee Hooker.
When I was young, my mom would make chicken-mayonnaise sandwiches for padkos on our annual December trip to Cape Town from Joburg. We'd also have flasks of tea, with milk and sugar.
Now that I'm grown up, the flask has coffee and the sandwiches are rye bread, butter and marmite. If we run out it's a toasted cheese-and-tomato from a garage shop.
If I know where I'm going, I like to just get there. If I'm not sure where I'm going, I don't mind taking more time.
Often we'll choose left or right depending on how green the grass is. We'll choose any back road rather than the highway. We'll take any pass just to make the road trip longer.
My most surreal road-trip experience was pulling over on the side of the road in the middle of the night in Botswana and sleeping in the back of the car.
From far away, we heard a sound that we couldn't interpret. It took about 45 minutes of the sound getting louder and louder and closer and closer. We still didn't know what it was.
Then an old bakkie screamed past us, with a sound system on the back, music blaring louder than any disco we'd ever been to. and then another 45 minutes or so until the sound faded away again.
My dream ride is a kombi with a bed in the back - and then the road trip will be long and we'll meander wherever looks lovely. It's wonderful to just stop wherever you like.
My bucket-list road trip would be across Canada to Hudson Bay, or up the Skeleton Coast to Kunene in Namibia, or The Australian outback, or Moscow to Vladivostok (next to the train line).
JENNIFER PLATT, BOOKS EDITOR
As a family back in the '80s, we always used to travel together from Joburg to Cape Town for the December holidays. Grandmas, grandpas, uncles, aunts, cousins, all packed tightly in a convoy of four to six cars. Our stopover was in my grandfather's hometown of Kimberley, staying with cousins, drinking cream soda ice-cream floats and sleeping on the porch because it was always so hot.
My weirdest road-trip moment was on a quiet, warm Sunday afternoon, my friends and I stopped in Victoria West to see the movie theatre that the little town was known for. But there was only silence with not a single person in the main street. Tumbleweed rolled past.
Then we heard a screeching noise in the distance, as if there was a bicycle in desperate need of oil coming our way. We waited to see what it was but there was nothing. We promptly got back on the road.
I still drive with my old CD case, which contains an inexplicable amount of Californian rock from Bob Seger to Sheryl Crow, a bit of country and a lot of Taylor Swift.
We always had padkos - meatball sandwiches, grated cheddar cheese and tomato slices on cream crackers, and always lots of oranges. These days the urge is still strong to pack padkos, though now it's a bag or two of Woolies goodies.
My dream ride offers all the comforts and space - a lovely roomy 4x4.
My dream road trip would be driving from New York to Maine in the fall, via Massachusetts and New Hampshire. It seems like a beautiful, romantic journey with just enough Stephen King references to give it a creepy edge.
PAUL ASH, TRAVEL EDITOR
My favourite road trip ever was 2,000km on lonely back roads from Kimberley to Cape Town via Colesberg, Nieu Bethesda, the Wild Coast and the Langkloof on a knackered Yamaha XT500 scrambler. In winter.
Akasic Record by The Kalahari Surfers might be the best road trip album ever recorded. That and the soundtrack to Blackhawk Down, and Xavier Rudd huffing away on a didgeridoo while playing drums.
Truck stops are the soul of road trips. Also, I love the secret tomato sauce and gherkins on a Wimpy burger. I know I'm not alone.
I like to dawdle. Hours can turn into days when I'm at the wheel.
My most surreal road-trip moment was during that long bike trip I mentioned. The Yammie and I got a lift in the freezing, empty caboose of a freight train from Graaff-Reinet to Willowmore. I was woken from a fitful doze at midnight by the sound of branches screeching down the side of the carriage and remembered it was my birthday. At Willowmore - now off the train - I huddled over a cigarette to keep warm.
My ride is a Toyota Yaris. I broke down twice in a classic 1600 Beetle on two blistering trips in the Karoo - enough to learn that I like my ride to get me where I want to go.
My dream road trip would be New York to LA off the Interstate...
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