At some point each generation should become accountable for itself, and reject the spread of racial hatred. As have the family of Adam Catzavelos. But were they not responsible for his upbringing? Of course they were.
No-one is born a bigot. No-one is born with prejudice. Nor was Adam. That is something learnt at home, then inculcated by friends and across communities. As was the case with Adam.
Ultimately, it is the adults in children's lives who are responsible for passing hatred from generation to generation. I pity Adam's children.
If it all starts when our children are taught the ABCs and how to count, and if our children grow up with what they learnt at home and too many of them don't reject or correct it, but accept it, racial bigotry goes on and spreads.
It becomes the ignorance that's passed down from generation to generation through the hundreds if not millions of Penny Sparrows, Vicki Mombergs and now Adam Catzaveloses.
How is Adam going to answer his kids when they ask him: "Dad, why were you banned from visiting our school?" Let us hope he knows that, as parents, we need to tell children that racism exists and explain what it is.
Let's leave Adam and talk about all parents and families. We all know that the most important thing is for parents to start talking about race early on. It is a pity that parents underestimate the likelihood of kids hearing racial slurs. It is sad that there are those who assert that racism is obsolete and not a contemporary problem.
The truth is, racism is a current event; only its expression is more disguised and subtle. It is a pity that parents and families struggle with what to do when someone makes a racial slur in front of their children. As Adam's brother Nic did. Some struggle with whether they should set an example by speaking out and show that such comments aren't acceptable. As did Nic and many others.
Some are not sure whether a confrontation may be too uncomfortable and magnify the insult. When the offending person is a friend or loved one, things get even more complicated.
As parents, we must teach our children the different definitions of racism as contained in many dictionaries: the negative beliefs, attitudes, actions, or behaviours that are based on phenotypic characteristics or ethnic affiliations; the beliefs in inherent superiority or inferiority on the basis of perceived group attributes, often conceptualised as including beliefs and attitudes (racial prejudice) and actions and practices (racial discrimination); and that it can occur on individual, internal, or structural (institutional) levels, and be either subtle or obvious.
As parents, we should provide age-specific information rather than leave our children on their own, unaware and ungrounded, to experience it.
Our children should be exposed as early as possible to stories, books and films that introduce historical figures and events in history that illustrate survival, resilience and success in combating racism.
As parents, we should provide informed answers why racist situations occur and how they can be handled. Effective strategies should be emphasised, including how institutional racism requires a legislative response and how racism may require law enforcement or increased education to overcome ignorance.
We need to teach our children that in life, some things are not going to be fair. That there are going to be some white people who will not like you simply because you are black, but at the same time, there are good white people and bad white people, and that tolerating and celebrating diversity should be our life-long journey.
To solve these problems of structured inequality, we must first acknowledge the reality of racism in everyday life. Then we must develop and propagate social and institutional norms and values that reject racism and advance true equal opportunity.
If we truly want to stop this inheritance of racial bigotry perpetuated by people like the Sparrows, Mombergs, Catzaveloses and their ilk, we must work together - blacks and whites - and direct our anger and together fight bigotry in every community, in every home and in our communities to create a new context where everyone is treated fairly, equally and with respect, irrespective of colour, race, gender, nationality or religious belief.
If we succeed, then perhaps our children - black, white, Indian and coloured - will never have to struggle to understand why they can't be friends, as Adam thought. If we succeed, they will be able to live in peace.
If, as parents, we assume the primary responsibility of teaching our children about racism and how to handle it and then summon up our collective will to achieve genuine respect for the dignity of the individual and equal opportunities for all, we may succeed in reducing the number Adam Catzaveloses to a tiny fraction.
∗ Mkhondo heads The Media and Writers Firm, a ghost-writing and content development and reputation management hub..