‘Momfluencers’: the school runs, snacks and chaos behind the hashtags

As Mother’s Day celebrations get under way, the spotlight has been turned on a growing powerhouse in the digital landscape — the “momfluencer” and everything that lies beyond the sponsored hashtags and posts.

“It’s school runs, mess, snacks everywhere, trying to juggle work and mom life, and honestly just trying to get through the day. It’s all very normal and real,“ Vourné Kgosinkwe, the wife of Theo Kgosinkwe of Mafikizolo, says.

“The income is just a bonus. My daughter is my life, not my content strategy, and I’m always mindful of crossing that line. If she doesn’t want to do something, then we simply don’t do it. I respect her, and in age-appropriate ways I remind her that her voice matters in what we post. She’s also very outspoken, so she will tell you straight-up what she does and doesn’t like.”

Turning family life into online content comes with its own unique set of pressures. For actress Zola Nombona, who parents her six-year-old son with actor Thomas Gumede, the emotional awareness required when filming is what is most important.

“One of my challenges is the pressure of making sure I never miss any signs of discomfort coming from him during a shoot, or whenever he is in front of the camera.”

My daughter is my life, not my content strategy, and I’m always mindful of crossing that line.

—  Vourné Kgosinkwe

“The one thing I am always sensitive to is the complexity of motherhood. Children are not the same, and we moms and dads are not the same, so there is no blueprint for being a parent. To answer your question, though, I wish mommies would understand that, although it may look like I’ve got everything under control, it’s really always a challenging balancing act.”

While Nombona is happy share aspects of her parenthood journey, she sets boundaries by making sure she does not reveal her son’s location in real time.

For Miss South Africa 2007 winner Tansey Coetzee, including her eight-year-old daughter Peyton in her social media posts “comes naturally”.

Creating content has for many years been part of Tansey’s everyday life, but she never set out to become a content creator. She always shared what felt authentic, and over time her content began attracting attention. Eventually, brands started reaching out and offering to pay her to produce content for them, and that’s how her career as a “momfluencer” began.

“I hid my pregnancy for more than seven months for safety reasons. Before my journey to motherhood even started, I was diagnosed with stage-4 endometriosis and needed space to process everything privately. I chose to share my story only later, when I saw it could bring hope and comfort to others going through similar experiences.”

“Peyton was born to shine — she’s a natural in front of the camera and genuinely loves being part of everything I do.”

Days spent off camera are the best ones for Coetzee, and she and her daughter enjoy school drop-offs and pick-ups. They say their prayers and sing their favourite songs in the car, and also spend time outside painting, shooting hoops, going for long walks, cooking dinner, baking and swimming.

”The hardest part of being a mom is definitely finding time to rest. As a single parent, there really isn’t much “me time”, and my mind is constantly in overdrive. I’m always thinking 10 steps ahead and doing maths backwards in my head. Being a mother can feel overwhelming at times, but this year I’ve made a conscious effort to slow down a little and give myself at least one day a week to rest. Although when I say ‘rest’, I really just mean doing everything else and skipping the gym!”

Linda Mtoba, an actress and content creator, posts special mommy-and-me moments on social media from time to time but says the moment parenthood felt like a business was when she started to shy away from it.

“I didn’t want to make a profit from my child. I’ll always turn down something that isn’t true to me — something I don’t believe in or that I feel is detached from my reality. I always build my brand from trust. People rely on the brands I work with because I have built trust over the years, and I would never want to jeopardise my audience’s faith in me,” she says.

“The moment I saw that what I was doing was monetisation was when I realised I didn’t want to sacrifice being an authentic parent to my child. I also wanted to protect her from the world. I think I realised that later on she will be her own person who will have the right to decide if she wants me to be a part of her life or to be on social media, so for now I’m protecting her.“

While she might look picture-perfect on the red carpet, Mtoba said her life was just like everyone else’s, consisting mainly of school runs, heading out to work, and making her way home again.

“It’s very much the typical day most moms, especially working moms, experience,” she said.