Candice Modiselle's ready to give less of herself: I’ve been the strong friend for too long

“As someone who’s previously struggled with codependency and overcommitting to my relationships at my own expense, I’m learning to say 'Not now', without guilt.”

16 July 2020 - 08:00
Candice Modiselle told some serious truths on Twitter.
Candice Modiselle told some serious truths on Twitter.
Image: Via Candice Modiselle's Instagram

As the global pandemic continues to take its toll on people's mental health, actress Candice Modiselle has shared some of the ways she's choosing to prioritise herself without feeling guilty about neglecting other things or people.

The Generations: The Legacy actress took to Twitter to explain that after the challenging first half of 2020 that she's had, she had come to the realisation that she no longer has the capacity to be “the strong friend”.

“I also think I don’t have the capacity to be as supportive, present and 'strong' in my friendships as what I used to be. Without guilt. I can’t. Not now. And that’s okay. I’ve been the strong friend for too long.”

Candice explained that she's had to learn to allow herself to be a bit more stingy with her time and not feel guilty for putting herself first. The actress said she had learnt the hard way about the results of “codependency and overcommitting” in her previous relationships.

“As someone who’s previously struggled with codependency and overcommitting to my relationships (both platonic and romantic) at my own expense, I’m learning to say 'Not now', without guilt. You’re not a bad person for setting boundaries and choosing to not 'always be there'.”

Many of her fans agreed with her sentiments, saying it's not a bad thing to sometimes be absent from other people's lives to take care of yourself.

However others said it was selfish, unless she was willing to accept the same treatment from the people she considers her support system.


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