LootLove on trying to ‘move on’ after losing her baby brother: 'It’s ripping me apart'

Mzansi has continued to send love and light vibes towards media personality LootLove, who recently lost her baby brother Luke and has been struggling to deal with his death.

Last week LootLove shared the news that her brother had died. While the cause of death remains unknown, Loot has laid her shattered soul on the TL for all to see.

On Thursday, the mother of twins took to her Instagram stories to pen a heartfelt note detailing her thoughts as she attempts to move on without her brother.

“And then there was silence. No more knocking on my door asking if I've eaten, no more fake screeching tyre and the girls laughing uncontrollably while you guys play. No more, 'please open the gate my niggz'. No more laughter, no more stories and fun facts about life. The rubrics cube has lost all its colours and turned black. The lights have dimmed. I miss you so much already. I don't know how this life must continue beyond this," LootLove wrote.

She also opened up about feeling vulnerable and being forced to surrender to the process of healing no matter how much it makes no sense to her .

LootLove admitted she's not okay but said she has also realised she had no control over the recent events in her life, especially the fact that life seems to be moving on when all she wants is for the world to pause.

Read her full Instagram TL post below:

True strength lies in being vulnerable and the only way I’ve been able to move forward spiritually is through surrendering to my purpose qha I never ever thought this is how I learn and grow.

The most confusing part is trusting this process that feels like it’s ripping me apart and shredding me to pieces but ... I guess even though I can’t see the light and don’t understand the things unfolding, I still have to try have faith and know that he is God.

It is not well with my soul but today, I will try my best to walk through a world without the light that is my brother because there is something bigger than me at play. I doubt I’ll move gracefully and when the grief grips me, I will let it.

The wild thing is: Life is still moving and to be honest, I’d really like everything to pause for a bit but, even when are breaking we are still building. One hour at a time until 24 hrs doesn’t look like the impossible.