16 Days of Activism: Zoleka Mandela on hating herself after being abused as a child

As the country marks 16 Days of Activism against gender-based violence (GBV), Zoleka Mandela has opened about the trauma she experienced after being abused as a child.

In a heartfelt Instagram post this week, the granddaughter of late former President Nelson Mandela  shared a picture of herself as a minor, and revealed she spent decades blaming herself for the abuse she received.

“This is me as a child. I spent decades blaming myself, believing that all the sexual abuse by both the men and women in my life, I deserved,” she said.

“Not knowing that I would be physically and sexually abused even more (after this picture was taken), convinced that I didn’t deserve more.”

She said for a while she hated herself and attempted suicide to end a life she felt she “didn't deserve”.

She said her addiction to sex and drugs was an attempt to numb the self-hate because she wanted to “feel something good”.

Zoleka said she was now stronger and was more than what had happened to her.

“I am more than someone who used to self-harm or cut themselves, I am far more than an addict, a survivor of depression and anxiety, more than a survivor. I am deserving of the life I want for myself. I am strength, I am self-love, I am worthy, I am love, a fighter and I am a force to be reckoned with. I am Zoleka.”