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Ayanda Borotho reminds women stuck in toxic relationships: 'Leaving is love'

20 January 2022 - 15:00 By Constance Gaanakgomo
Ayanda Borotho said leaving is also a form of love to self.
Ayanda Borotho said leaving is also a form of love to self.
Image: Instagram/Ayanda Borotho

Actress and author Ayanda Borotho has reminded women feeling stuck in toxic relationships that leaving that kind of environment is love.

It can be emotionally taxing, but she has challenged her followers to ask themselves key questions and then leave what no longer serves them.

The author has been very vocal about self-love, mental health and shares on her Instagram excepts from her book Unbecoming To Become as motivation to her readers.

She has also been at the forefront of tackling these issues daily. While you are still stuck in the relationship, the actress asked is it taking you forward?

Ayanda alluded to the saying put yourself first as the key to understanding why toxic relationships can ruin someone's peace of mind. 

“Came here to remind those who feel stuck in toxic relationships, friendships and environments that “Leaving is love.” Stop serving what doesn't  serve you back. And sometimes it may serve you, but does it serve you right? Does it serve you kindly? Does it serve you forward? There's a difference.”

Some of her followers thanked her for reminding them about what matters.

In one of her other “pearls of wisdom”, the actress opened up about self-love and her journey back to self.

“I'm learning one of the biggest and heaviest loads we carry is the burden of ‘owing’ people and the ‘expectation’ to pay back for what was or is being done towards us or for us. And vice versa. We have expectations of people too because of what we have done for them.

“We live in such a transactional world that it’s rare to come across people who are simply genuine (though they do exist). We owe parents for not abandoning us. We owe friends for being in our corner.”

“We owe husbands for not cheating on us and being good fathers. We owe employers for giving us and keeping us in the job. We owe those who have opened doors of opportunity for us. What a huge debt it must be to carry.”

Ayanda explained that the narrative should be that the people who are doing all these things are playing their chosen roles.

“When the real narrative should be parents have an obligation to raise us to the best of their ability. They chose to have us. True friends are always in your corner. Loyalty is not for sale. Husbands are meant to love us and our children. Being a good husband or father is not doing your wife and children a favour. It is his responsibility (and blessing).”


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