‘My daily prayers keep me alive’ — TNS opens up about being suicidal

‘It’s not like someone wakes up and thinks about this. My life was never easy. I have suicidal thoughts. It’s not something that started now’

02 March 2022 - 07:00 By Joy Mphande
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Musician and club DJ TNS alarmed fans with a cryptic message.
Musician and club DJ TNS alarmed fans with a cryptic message.
Image: Instagram/ TNS

Nkazimulo “TNS” Ngema has his fans concerned for his life after he left a cryptic message on social media.

The music producer and club DJ took to Facebook on Monday with a post that had his fans convinced he suggested taking his own life while teasing the release of a single titled Kubi.

“Before ngizibulale ngzonipha ingoma yokugcina ithi Kubi (Before I kill myself I am going to release my last song titled Kubi). Thank You,” he wrote.

Before ngizibulale ngzonipha ingoma yokugcina 🙏🏾 ithi KUBI , Thank You

Posted by TNS on Monday, February 28, 2022

Speaking to TshisaLIVE he said while he is not certain Kubi will be his last song, the post was a reminder to people to always check on each other. He said he hopes not to give up on his fans. 

“As people we are not the same, we come from different backgrounds. My life was never easy from my birth, I have a lot of spirits. If I don't pray, I know I will be suicidal. No-one knows. My daily prayers are what keep me alive. It's not like someone wakes up and thinks about this. My life was never easy. I  have suicidal thoughts. It's not something that started now.

“Things have tormented me while on my way, they have haunted me. There are spirits that haunt. I just want people to forget that I am a person with many flaws because that's not me. How do you enjoy your dream come true when there are lies, when they are so many rumours about me? How will you enjoy whatever money you get when you are haunted? Do you care about money? No. When I first arrived in the entertainment industry, people dragged me into lies.” 

During a previous interview with TshisaLIVE, TNS said he was intentional with leaving messages in his music. 

“I'm a message person, that's my gift. I can make you dance but the thing God wants me to do when you listen to my music is he wants me to send a message to you. He wants  everyone to feel alive. That's my gift.” he said.

Coming from humble beginnings, TNS said music had made the greatest impact in his life.

“I knew what I was going through and everybody knew what TNS was going through and what life he was leading. I was everywhere in KwaMashu. The industry grew me. They gave me life, my fans gave me life, everybody who has downloaded my music gave me life. Everyone who booked me gave me life. Because now I'm able to take care of the child I made.

“I have a family. I have the mother of my child. The industry had to change me, it had to give me money and the whole of SA had to give me money  for my life to change and for that I'm thankful.”

For help, call the SA Depression and Anxiety Group (Sadag) suicide helpline 0800-567-567, Sadag helplines 0800-456-789/0800-21-22-23/0800-70-80-90, SMS 31393 or see www.sadag.org.



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