Moneoa Moshesh has gone through a difficult few years after her break up with her ex but she has started afresh and says she’s grateful and feels good to be in her own space again.
She suddenly became the centre of attention after opening up about her personal life on social media last week.
She told TshisaLIVE she was determined to get her life back on track and this includes opening up about things she had bottled up for years that were doing her more harm than good.
Listen Moneoa talking to TshisaLIVE below:
Moneoa said her life fell apart after her break-up with her ex.
“I was depressed these past three years, I haven't been OK in a very long time, like I was depressed. I don't like to say it but I was suicidal and this has put my family through so much strain because there isn't nothing that they haven't tried to help me and none of the attempts worked. They would sit and watch me cry myself to sleep and sink into my own oblivion and they literally watched me deteriorate and there was nothing they could do about it. It was like watching a house burn with all the belongings in it and there's nothing you can do, you just have to sit there and let it burn.
“It was horrible, it was horrible for me to go through that. It was horrible for my family to witness, for like a good year-and-a-half after we broke up. I was still holding on to the memory of what we were and everything we've built in the two years we were together because I was so fixated in the love that he expressed for me and I thought it was a love that could stand the test of time, whereas for him it was a phase and he got what he wanted.”
After being in a relationship where she was allegedly abused by her ex, Moneoa said she had an internal battle with speaking out about her past relationship and she has on many occasions chosen to keep quiet and protect her ex.
“There was a production that was starting earlier this year.It fell through, but it was being pitched to Netflix by a friend of mine. He asked me to be part of a production and it would require me to speak about my experiences with gender-based violence and so I told Phiwe, out of courtesy mind you, I didn't need to tell him jack. I don't owe him anything, but I told him out of courtesy and said I'm going to do this show that might be coming out of Netflix. I'm gonna talk about you and my experience with you, but I won't mention your name. I said to him I'm not gonna say anything about you.”
The singer says there has been times when she would've spoken up, but she chose to keep quiet
“There was a #MeToo movement and the whole time I felt so guilty reposting the #metoo movement and talking about #metoo. Meanwhile, I'm this ambassador for all kinds of anti-GBV campaigns. I'm working for anti-GBV organisations and I'm quiet about my story because I'm still protecting my abuser ... and I kept quiet when I saw #Metoo and it was huge, everybody was sharing their stories, I kept my mouth shut. There are so many opportunities I've had and those are the things that he knew.
The singer said she held off speaking up because she thought her ex would do right by her.
“I felt like a hypocrite. I felt like an absolute hypocrite and on top of that and I felt fiery on the inside because I did want to say something, but I still had hope that this guy had a decent bone in his body. I still had hope that he would do the right thing. I had to have hope that he would return my car. I believed everything that he said when he told me that he would return it. When he told me he would fix the situation of the car and this and that I believed him. I still had hope that the Phiwe that I knew and first met and the guy that I fell in love with would do right by me.”
As Moneoa gears up for a legal fight with her ex over allegations she has levelled against him, he has also laid his own charges against her.
TshisaLIVE reached out to Phiwe who confirmed having laid charges against the singer, but chose not to comment about what Moneoa said on social media.
“I did open a case of extortion and intimidation and there's a protection order against her for all the harassment that she has caused me over the course of the years. But I have no intention of going public on my end, in particular the issues emanating from what happened last week because there's legal recourse that we can pursue on the matter and I'm just pursuing it legally, nothing else. I believe, I have no other view other than justice must be served.
“I know for one that the allegations are untrue, so we don't have any legal recourse you know, particularly as men being in women's month. I mean whoever comes out with their version of the truth first is more likely to be the one riding the white horse. But it has affected me. Fortunately for me I know there is provision within the law to pursue legal action against such, hence I've chosen to go that route and because my case is substantial enough against negative or untrue allegations,” he said.
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