With this ring I me wed

When 38-year-old Sophie Tanner celebrated her second wedding anniversary, there were none of the usual trappings - no flowers or romantic meal for two, no card sealed with a kiss.

It's not that her other half is remiss, but that on May 16 2015, when the PR consultant took her vows on the steps of Brighton's Unitarian Church, the person she swore to cherish for eternity was, well, herself.

"I literally had the idea when I was lying in bed recovering from flu and a bad relationship," she remembers.

"Everyone celebrates getting together with someone and getting married, but there's no milestone in society that celebrates returning to your own happiness and contentment."

Initially, Tanner's idea was to write a book in which a woman married herself, but after two years researching sologamy - people who commit to themselves - for her novel, Happily, she was sold.

"By the end of that journey I was such an advocate for it as a concept that I thought I'd better do it myself," she says. Tanner's vows were all adapted from their biblical origins, she wore a £60 (about R1,000) vintage white dress and her father, Malcolm, a 69-year-old painter and decorator, gave her away - to herself. Afterwards, the 50-strong wedding party danced through the streets of Brighton and down to the beach to the sounds of Kendrick Lamar's I Love Myself playing from a boom box.

It's tempting to dismiss this as the height of Generation Selfie's narcissism, particularly as the ceremony is not legally recognised. But for Tanner, the weight of the occasion - a celebration of being single, and enjoying it - still holds.

"I got really nervous the day before. It felt like a really important thing to be doing ."

Sologamy is worlds away from the spinster stereotype.

Committing to herself, says Erika Anderson, was "an act of defiance". The 37-year-old, who lives in New York, wed her university sweetheart in her 20s, but the pair split aged 30 after growing apart.

Now, some 42% of British marriages end in divorce and unmarried women outnumber their married counterparts.

Its proponents say sologamy is a modern rite of passage.

"A wedding is just a marker in life," explains Alexandra Gill, a Canadian food critic who married herself in 2006 and renewed her vows on her 10th wedding anniversary last year.

"Our mothers and grandmothers didn't have the choice to remain single . . . Self-marriage is an opportunity to celebrate our personal independence, self-reliance and freedom from the chains of convention."

A number of businesses have spotted opportunities. Gill launched Marry Yourself Vancouver, a wedding planning service, last year. In Japan, where one in seven women are unmarried, Cerca Travel offers a two-day package that includes make up, hair styling and a photo shoot for £2,500 (about R43,100) and up.

When news of Tanner's wedding hit the headlines, many on social media were quick to call her a narcissist; acquaintances, too, haven't held back: "A couple of guys have become a bit incensed," she says. She still goes on dates, but has no plans to marry anyone (else).

"One told me I couldn't have my cake and eat it by marrying myself and then going on to have other relationships, and a man I was having a holiday fling with flipped out," she says. "[But] most of the guys I've been out with have been really supportive. It's been a good filter to see their reactions; if they suddenly become wary, they're not the one for me anyway."

Perhaps sologamy is the inevitable next step for millennials, who have already traded the traditional grown-up signifiers of homeownership for travelling the world, itinerant careers and moving from one rented flat to the next. In these very modern marriages, as with so much else, the only constant seems to be themselves. - The Daily Telegraph, London