WATCH | 'I'm also still trying to understand it fully' - HHP on depression in last interview

HHP'S last interview with Slikour has been released. He opened up about depression and what he saw in his future.

12 November 2018 - 10:14
By Chrizelda Kekana

Just over a week before Mzansi was shattered by the untimely death of  HHP, who took his own life after a long battle with depression, the musician opened up to Slikour about the demons he was facing.

A week after HHP's burial, Slikour shared the last interview he had with his friend on his website Slikour on Life.

HHP opened up about his depression and how was dealing with it.

"Depression is something that everyone experiences. I saw some stat somewhere that said one in six people in South Africans are suffering from depression. From my understanding of it, depression is just part of the grief that people go through. It is one of the five steps which is right before acceptance."

HHP explained what he believed was one of the root causes of his depression.

"You get to a point where you become so comfortable in your way of life, whether in your industry, whatever it is that you are doing. In my case, it was in the music. Seeing that drastic change from how things used to be to where they are now, it can kinda be a shock to the system. You ask yourself 'what does this mean for me? Does it mean you can't contribute anymore to the music or you have to conform to what is happening?' And I went through that..."

The Harambe rapper said he accepted his situation and began a journey to heal. He credited a huge part of healing and dealing with depression to the friends he kept. HHP also made it clear that he wouldn't want to be at the forefront of a discussion about depression because he was still trying to fully understand his.

"Music is an anti-depressant in itself and perhaps there could be forums or whatever. Right now I don't see myself moving into a place where I am an advocate for such, because I am also still trying to understand it fully."

HHP died on October 24.

Two years ago, SowetanLIVE reported that HHP admitted that he had visited an online suicide website in an attempt to help him get information on how to end his life.

HHP has previously shared that his battle with depression had left him suicidal and he recalled attempting to take his life three times before on CliffCentral.

“The last attempt‚ I’m fighting with my girlfriend or some shit. They tell me to try helium. I get the helium tank… I turn this thing on and I’m thinking ‘This is finally going to work’. The wifey has just gone to her friend’s house and by the time she gets back‚ I’ll be cold. The website says it should work in eight minutes and it’s an hour and 12 minutes later now‚ so I start cursing.”

HHP was buried on Saturday November 3 in Mafikeng, North West.