Ayanda Borotho: Marriage should not be bondage

While on a journey to find her true self, actress Ayanda Borotho reflected on what her character on Isibaya taught her throughout the years.

Ayanda shared on Instagram that her character Phumelele MaDlamani showed her how no one was immune to systematic patriarchy in our society and what marriage does to women after being married.

“This character Phumelele MaDlamani taught me so much in the seven years of portraying her. None of us are immune to systematic patriarchy in our society. I drew many parallels from her and my own life when I wrote about the stage in every woman's life before marriage and when we are in the marriage.”

The actress added that although patriarchy is seen in many women's lives, marriage should not be an enslavement of any kind.

“What I know for sure is that marriage should not be bondage. Marriage should be a safe and liberating space where people grow to be their best version and to do it honouring each other.”

In her recently released book, Unbecoming to Become, Ayanda talks about finding the new normal in order to make relationships, especially marriage, work.

“One of the things I point out in my book is that ... when it's not working divorce is not always the best [option] unless you are physically, emotionally and mentally harmed. We are not trees. We can move.

“People evolve. Relationships evolve. Marriage evolves. You can always find a new normal ... if it's worth it.”