How to talk about the 'Game of Thrones' finale without giving spoilers

You've waited eight seasons for this moment, the moment when you finally find out who will sit on the Iron Throne (we assume there will be one after the fire and brimstone of the previous episode).

You've watched the finale. You've rooted for your favourites and probably shed a tear or two — or cheered — as they kicked the bucket (or ended up roasted alive). Now you're desperate to discuss it with someone — a colleague, a friend or even an Uber driver would do.

But how do you talk the Game of Thrones finale without spoiling the plot for everyone else around you? 

While finding a sound-proof room to talk in is the ultimate prize, that's not always possible. So here are five handy tips to help you have those all-important discussions without giving anything away:

1. HAVE THEY WATCHED IT?

Most important step: make sure whoever you're going to talk to has actually watched the episode. Walk over with an excited, manic look in your eye. Ask simply "Have you ...?" and if they follow with a sharp "No!" then that's a not-so-subtle hint to end the conversation right there.

If it's a yes and that manic glimmer in their eye matches yours, then proceed to step 2.

2. ARE THEY A 'FAN-FRIEND'?

This is very crucial. You need to find someone who is not only a GoT fan but also a close friend or colleague.

As a friend they should hopefully be able to pick up on the subtle cues you'll employ in the following steps without looking at you hopelessly. Likewise, they need to be a fan to understand even half of what you're saying.

3. KEEP YOUR VOICE LOW

So this seems obvious, but we need to reiterate this. Even if you follow the next step carefully, a smart "fan-friend" nearby who hasn't watched the episode may hear you.

4. DON'T USE NAMES

This is a hard one, but if you've successfully completed step 2 it should be easier. Try discuss the concepts, plots, THAT person who should have died without actually naming them, or the places they were in.

Upset about the plot or character whip-arounds (we're looking at you Queen of Ashes) try starting your conversation like this:

You: So about THAT decision she made ...

Friend: I know right, I'm so upset. It made no sense!

You: It would have if they built up to it. It's a problem with pacing.

Friend: Right! It doesn't gel with the character. That's just bad writing.

You: But the special effects were cool.

Friend: Totally, can't argue there.

If you followed the above conversation, 10 points and move on to step 4. If not... well, maybe you need to go watch episode five again before you continue ( just saying).

5. EVALUATE YOUR SUCCESS

After your initial foray, you need to do a quick evaluation. Does your 'fan-friend' seem completely lost? Is anyone baying for your blood, hurling curses and calling you a spoiler? Or is your friend equally animated by the discussion and everyone looking at you like you're both crazy.

If the latter you have succeeded in having your spoiler-free conversation. Congratulations and continue!