A change in appearance is a sign of health

Nica Cornell: Recently, I discovered that there are women in Asia who have surgery on their eyelids in an attempt to acquire a more "Western" shape.

Theoretically, I'm Western looking and I can't say I've ever spent time ruminating on the shape of my lids. However, to someone, somewhere this matters. And I'm in no position to judge. Because even when we aren't after an ideal image, we still seek to change our appearance.

Nothing's fixed anymore. You can wear coloured contact lenses, have a nose job, a boob job or have your genitalia trimmed. They even changed my race for a play last year - there goes racism up in smoke.

If we drive past a tattoo parlour and I say: "Let's go get one", my mom doesn't bat an eyelid. She has always known I like them. But, on discovering that my heart's desire was an eyebrow ring, she informed me that I couldn't expect to come home if had one put in. Ever. Why? It's ugly. She doesn't want to see it. So, I can imprint my skin permanently with ink but I can't get a tiny (reversible) hole. Yup, I don't get it either.

In grade 8 I dyed my hair fire-engine red. Two months later, I cut it to my ears. That was all about stepping out of the bounds of my "good-girl" image. It was a rebellion against control.

At that age, there is so little that you have a say over, all you really control is your body. You are rebelling against the way your creator decided you should look. Now, there's a kick.

I've just added some black to the brown hair I later learnt to cherish. Why? As a friend said: "It shows the wild streak beneath all that control." It's true. The black is a reminder that I am in control.

A change in appearance can seem ridiculous, yet we never know the reasons it was deemed necessary. Sometimes, it feels like you're flirting with another side of life, telling a secret without a single word or creating the image you have always wanted.

It can be unhealthy, it can become obsessive, it can stop you seeing your true beauty. It can also be the kick you need to get yourself through all the anger-fuelling, mind-bending, boring stuff.

And, isn't it better to fulfil the need to dance across the line with a needle piercing your ears instead of your veins?