Fellow travellers pay

Our leading communist, in his chauffeur-driven BMW 750i, tells us roads are a plaything for the rich

THE last time I wrote about e-tolling in Gauteng I got sued. Sbu Ndebele took exception to my fantastic Latin designation of Sburidium ndebelicus , and my linking this organism's parasitic tendencies to the e-tolling on roads we've already paid for.

So, deep breath, let's jump right into it again.

Blade Nzimande stunned me this week. There he was on eNews saying "the rich" who use the highways should "pay for these luxuries".

Hmmm right, where to begin?

As with Ndebele, it was both the tone and content of what was said that was deeply offensive.

Blade's fangs were dripping with venomous self-righteousness and disdain. It made me vomit a little in my mouth. (Although that could've been the bug that's been doing the rounds in Jozi.)

Let's start with the facts.

Firstly, roads are not luxuries. It's called infrastructure, Blade. Without which this country's economy would grind to a standstill.

That's why infrastructure development was such a key theme in President Jacob Zuma's state of the nation address. It's also why it was such a key element of Finance Minister Pravin Gordhan's budget speech.

Secondly, it's not the rich who are worried about forking out. Tokyo Sexwale, Patrice Motsepe, Johann Rupert and the like are not sweating the extra R500 they'll need to drive on the highways in Gauteng.

It's the working- to middle-class - even upper middle-class - South Africans who will feel the pain.

And the knock-on inflationary effect will be felt by all. (Economics for dummies: if the cost of transporting goods or providing services increases, this additional cost will be passed on to the consumer. Driving prices up, making life a little harder for the people Blade claims to represent.)

Thirdly, you're richer than I am, Blade. I'm middle class. Your ministerial salary of R1.9-million puts you at the top end, comrade. (Said remuneration package was effective April Fool's, 2011. What to make of that, I wonder?)

Unlike you, my perks are few. The odd long lunch being the most cherished. They do not include a BMW 750i at a cost of R1.1-million that you chose for yourself on taking office.

Which, when bought in 2009, was the top of the range, if I'm not mistaken. In technical terms that little piece of Bavarian engineering was the last number, comrade! Yoh!

But, of course, we know that you did that so we could live vicariously through you.

À la Kgalema at the big centenary bash in Bloem: "The leaders will now enjoy the champagne, and of course they do so on your behalf through their lips." #classic!

If that's how communists roll then I'm wrong to have dissed them in the past. For a BMW 7-series, I'd seriously consider swearing allegiance to the red hammer and sickle and pretend to get periods every October.

Blade won't be affected by e-tolling. His transport costs are already covered by us.

To end the week on a high note, Blade released into the ether his latest musings on the Umsebenzi website. With absolutely no sense of irony, said missive was titled "liberals as eternal political hypocrites". I quote: "Liberals have opportunistically cherry-picked on issues where they want to appear to be on the side of, or speaking for, the majority of the people [of] our country. They seek alliances with the workers when they seek to capture the SABC (the 'Save our SABC Coalition'). They would seek to build alliances with worker organisations on opposing the Protection of State Information Bill and 'civil society' coalitions to oppose e-tolling in Gauteng, even in courts, if need be.

"But we are yet to hear of 'civil society' initiatives against abuse of farmworkers, against labour brokers, or against retrenchments ... an important lesson for the working class about all this, [is] that we should be extremely vigilant about liberal fellow-travellers posing as friends and allies of the working class."

Fair comment.

Except, it is not, as Blade has framed it, a zero-sum game. One right at the expense of another.

Farmworkers' rights versus e-tolling. The right to know versus a living wage. No.

Take a leaf out of your own book, comrade. Stop pretending to be working class when you swan around in a 7-series.

Enough with the political hypocrisy. E-tolling is a result of poor planning. It's double taxation. And it's gonna sting.