Mother refuses to give up

Armed with cartridges of determination and a BlackBerry cellphone, Michelle Ohlsson fills a taxi with volunteers and goes in search of missing children around the country.

Despite not having resources, the mother of five refuses to give up until children are safely in the arms of their parents.

"I am trying to prevent mothers from feeling the pain I suffered," said Ohlsson from her Mitchells Plain home. Just above her head hangs a collage of her family portraits; it includes one of her son Matthew who went missing 15 years ago.

"I refuse to speak of him in the past tense. He is 24 years old. I will continue to speak about him in that way until I know what happened to him."

On March 24 1997, nine-year-old Matthew went out to fetch the dustbin from outside the family home and within seconds he was gone.

"I ran up and down the streets screaming ... I picked up everything. I emptied the cupboards, I lifted the beds and I searched for Matthew," she recalled and has refused to abandon the search.

In 1999 she started a group, Concerned Parents of Missing Children, and has found more than 200 youngsters.

They spent about eight years assisting in a search for a girl who went missing 18 years ago. This year she was found.

But it has not been smooth sailing for Ohlsson. For two years she suffered from depression and became overweight.

Psychologist Faheema Benjamin said it is crucial for parents to go for counselling.

"Counselling will also help to address the anger, helplessness and hopelessness felt," said Benjamin.

Shakirah Hardien, from Mitchells Plain, and Miena Carolus, from George, have suffered for years.

Hardien's five-year-old son, Rafique, went missing on August 11, 2004 - his body was found 17 days later. Though a convicted killer from the area admitted to being the last one to see Rafique alive, he has not been charged with his murder.

Carolus has been searching for three of her children who went missing in October 2004. She too slipped into depression for years.

According to the police's Bureau for Missing Persons, between 1500 and 1700 children are reported missing each year, the biggest number in Gauteng. Most children who go missing are between the ages of 12 and 18.

"Most of them run away from rural areas to the cities," said national police spokesman Captain Dennis Adriao, adding that the police find 85% of the children reported missing.

The police work closely with organisations such as Missing Children SA, to which 345 cases of missing children were reported between May 1 2011 and April 30 2012.

Andre Snyman, founder of eblockwatch, said most of the missing children they find have run away from home.

"The average runaway is a 14-year-old girl," said Snyman.

He said predators often lurk on social media sites such as Facebook.

"My advice to parents is check your child's Facebook profile," said Snyman.

Sometimes they end up working on farms or as prostitutes.

Ohlsson recalled that a man confessed to selling a five-year-old for R30000 years ago and she is still looking for her, as she is for Matthew.

"I believe Matthew is alive," she said.

WARNING SIGNS AND USEFUL TIPS FOR PARENTS

MISSING Children SA offered some of the following tips for parents:

• Do not wait 24 hours before reporting your children missing; do so immediately.
• Always keep a recent photograph of your child on hand.
• Know your child's friends' names, addresses and phone numbers.
• Create a family password. Should you send someone to pick your child up from school, that person should know the password.
• If your child is on Mxit or Facebook, familiarise yourself with the technology and monitor his activities.

Andre Snyman, founder of eblockwatch, warned that children who are likely to run away from home will often:

• Display strong mood swings, hide things and become very secretive;
• Become rebellious;
• Isolate themselves; and
• Often fail to communicate with their parents.

August anguish as mom remembers son's killing

THERE are three days in August that Shakirah Hardien dreads most.

Her youngest son, Rafique Hardien, would have celebrated his 13th birthday on August 4. On August 11 2004, the five-year-old was reported missing. Sixteen days later, on August 27, his body was found on a sand dune in Mitchells Plain.

"This isn't an easy month for me," said Hardien as she recalled her nightmare.

On the day of his disappearance he went to play at his "best buddy's" house in the area . Hardien said she came home early because her mother, who looked after him, was not feeling well.

"As I walked across the field, one of the neighbours came up to me and gave her sympathies for my missing son," Hardien said.

Shocked and confused, she found her mother sobbing in the house.

"She didn't want to look up. She said she was very sorry. She just started to cry ... I asked her why she didn't say Fiekie was missing but she couldn't stop crying."

Hardien said that though she had forgiven her son's killer, she was still angry.

"I have to move on because I have another son and at the end of the day I am not the one who will judge - it is Allah."