Many rivers to cross

Is Itumeleng Khune just dreaming about "African flair" in our football? BBK did not seem convinced on Saturday night at Soccer City.

The only flair - observed Bareng-Batho Kortjaas, with a heavy dose of sarcasm, in his Sunday Times report on another Kaizer Chiefs debacle - was four defeats in a row.

Indeed. If that is flair, give us ineptitude every time.

Khune, the Chiefs' goalie, declared last week - after his team had suffered only three defeats in a row - that the club's new coaching twosome, Donald "Ace" Khuse and Doctor Khumalo, had restored a "freedom of expression" following the departure of the no-doubt authoritarian and oppressive Vladimir Vermezovic.

"The African flair was always lacking," said Khune of all the Euro coaches that had been rendered to them by Kaizer. "A lot of the times European coaches restricted us and wanted us to play this direct football."

More shibobo spontaneity and less long ball perhaps? But is it the solution in the long term, or just something fancy to satisfy the fans? If Chiefs continue to play with the same "flair" they revealed in their last four games, the fans will soon be demanding an alternative. Rigidity to a game plan and discipline perhaps?

Fans are fickle and if you begin to indulge every wannabe Chiefs coach you will end up back in a metaphorical Belgrade before your contract runs out.

I'm not sure Khune is a Monty Python fan, but he would have been a dead cert for the Goalkeeper Poetry Class conducted on the show many, many years ago.

That's the one where a Brian Clough figure attempts to deconstruct goalkeeping.

"These goalies . are romantics," said Clough, aka Eric Idle, of a bunch of keepers, especially Bob Wilson of Arsenal and Gordon West of Everton, assembled to pen their thoughts on the Yangtse River (it's Python, remember).

"The Yangtse," continues Cloughie, "is a symbol for them. For them it's a box . they are, er, they're dreamers, er, the Yangtse's a symbol for them, er, for them it evokes, er, a temple as well as a, er, spiritual continuity."

Then Bill Shankly (Michael Palin) joins in: "Oh, it's a river of many moods. To a young goalie, like a Peter Shilton, of Leicester, the Yangtse is a beautiful river. To a more seasoned goalie, like Phil Parkes, of Wolves, it's a river of regret, of disillusioned ambition."

You can tell by the characters that it was done a long time ago (a young goalie like Peter Shilton indeed).

And if you think it sounds like a lot of nonsense, well you had to be there and understand that John Cleese & Co were taking the mickey out of post-match reviews, which is something always worth doing.

But revisiting Monty Python also helps put a player like Khune in perspective.

He's a dreamer and if he thinks all it needs for Chiefs to start winning is African flair, then dream on.