Oscar wakes up smelling blood

"You are the first people I think of when I wake up and the first people I pray for.

"Mr and Mrs Steenkamp, I want to take this opportunity to say that I am sorry. There is not a moment since this tragedy that I have not thought of you. I can't imagine the pain and the sorrow and the emptiness that I have caused you and your family."

In a trembling apology to Barry and June Steenkamp, Paralympian hero Oscar Pistorius poured his heart out to the world as he took the stand for the first time since killing his girlfriend, Reeva Steenkamp.

Pistorius - who said he has "taken refuge in God during this terrible tragedy" - has pleaded not guilty in the Pretoria High Court to murder, saying he shot Steenkamp in the mistaken belief there was an intruder in his Pretoria home in the early hours of Valentine's Day last year.

The state says he killed her after an argument.

Facing Steenkamp's mother, sitting in the front row of the public gallery - without her husband who has been too ill to attend the trial - Pistorius fought back tears, his lip trembling.

"I have been trying to put words down on paper, but no words suffice," he said.

"There is not a moment where I wake up and don't think about what happened. I was trying to protect Reeva. I want you to know that when she went to bed that night she was loved."

The sincerity of Pistorius's apology was the "million-dollar question", professor James Grant of the Wits Law School told The Times. "If the court regards it as sincere, it can unquestionably only count in his favour.

"If [he is] convicted of something related to Steenkamp's death then in sentencing it will be used to show if he has shown remorse."

But Grant said that one of the things the apology did not change was Pistorius's state of mind at the time he pulled the trigger.

Defence advocate Barry Roux, carefully guiding Pistorius through his testimony, asked him if he was on medication.

"Yes, various types . sleeping pills and antidepressants.

"I have difficulty sleeping . I am scared to sleep. I smell blood and I wake up terrified. I wake up in a state of complete terror at the slightest noises," Pistorius said.

"I hid in a cupboard towards the end of last year. There was a security guard outside my front door, but I was terrified and phoned my sister to come to me,'' he said.

Portraying Pistorius as a God-fearing Christian, a lover of dogs and as a victim of multiple violent crimes, the defence carefully laid out its case. Roux talked Pistorius through his disabilities, his childhood and his mother's death when he was 15.

He testified that his mother had been security conscious.

"We didn't live in the best of areas. There was a lot of crime. She slept with her pistol in a padded bag under her pillow. She would call the police, call us to her room and we would wait for the police to arrive."

He had not known his mother was sick before she died, he said.

"When she died I struggled with my faith."

Roux asked Pistorius how he had been affected by crime.

"My father has been hijacked twice. My brother was in an attempted hijacking. We have had many housebreakings," the athlete said.

"I've been followed home late at night. I've been shot at on the highway . a car was behind me, I pulled over, the car moved past me and then slowed down. That's when I saw the muzzle flashes and heard the bangs.

"I have helped people who have been victims of vicious assaults," said Pistorius.

And your religion? asked Roux.

"When I met Reeva I thought she was a blessing from God. Reeva was a strong Christian . she prayed for me at night about my training.

"It is God who has got me through this last year, which has been a struggle. God has been my refuge through this terrible tragedy; my strength."

Earlier, prosecutor Gerrie Nel had got pathologist Dr Jan Botha, the defence's first witness, to concede that Steenkamp could have screamed after the first shot to the hip. Botha also agreed with previous evidence that the fourth shot was a fatal head wound.

Tweets: Oscar Roux and Nel

Little sympathy for Oscar on Twitter:

@MvelaseP: But Joburgers, is your city as crazy as Oscar is making it out to be, because CPT sure as hell ain't!

@MkhariGiven: Oscar started his testimony on Soprano then Falsetto, now Turner with elements of Bass bubbling under.

@DeepFriedMan: This is like a therapy session. They should charge Oscar by the hour for this.

Reactions to the prosecution and defence styles:

@Patrawa: On any given day, coming to think of it, I would prefer being questioned by Barry Roux and not Gerrie Nel. Tjeeeerrr.

@Dmac176: I need #GerrieNel acting as one of my uncles on my lobola negotiation team #OscarTrial.

@zmvulane: Adv Gerrie Nel seems to have skipped breakfast just to be angry enough to really savour Professor Botha #OscarPistoriusTrial #TeamNel

Compiled by Andile Ndlovu and Poppy Louw