Touch, pause, grope! Royal hubby in sin bin

There's trouble in the British royal household again. This time it involves booze, a busty blonde and a dwarf-throwing contest. Thankfully, it has nothing to do with Prince William or the lovely Kate. The ructions are in the home of Princess Anne's newlywed daughter, Zara Tindall.

Only a few weeks ago, Zara married English rugby player Mike Tindall in Edinburgh. Although the Princess Royal has never wanted her children to have titles or be treated as royalty, the wedding was as good as a royal event.

Keeping an eye on arrangements was Anne who, it is rumoured, even suggested that the groom have his nose straightened for the event.

The event went ahead with his crooked snout and everyone seemed to have had a jolly good time. But the honeymoon is well and truly over after shocking reports about Mike's behaviour filtered back from the Rugby World Cup in New Zealand.

According to reports in the UK media, the newlywed was caught kissing and groping a blonde beauty in a Queenstown nightspot. To make matters worse, Mike and his England teammates were watching a dwarf-throwing contest. You can imagine how well this will go down with the bride back home, let alone the mom-in-law.

Reports said the players had piled into an impromptu scrum when Mike, 30, got tangled up with the blonde's cleavage. UK tabloid The Sun reported that when the fair-haired beauty flung herself at him, Mike could not resist. He was seen kissing and groping the girl, who also rubbed his face into her breasts.

The source told The Sun: "One particularly beautiful blonde went straight for Mike. But rather than reject her advances, unfortunately he was extremely responsive. The girl was absolutely stunning and all over him.

"It's not the behaviour you would expect of a man who is not only England captain but also now a member of the royal family," the source said. Perhaps Mike thought the old rule of "what happens on tour, stays on tour" still applied. He soon discovered that there's no such rule these days.

The incident occurred when several of the top players were in the bar to celebrate their hard-won victory over Argentina in their opening game. The group of women joined them.

Zara had been unable to be with her husband because she was competing in an equestrian competition. However, she had been expected to be in New Zealand for later games in the tournament. So far, there has been no official word from Anne or other members of the royal family. Mike is popular with his new relatives, but his actions won't go down well with the most senior members of the family.

Is it a coincidence that he is not playing in England's World Cup match against Georgia in Dunedin today?

As one marriage runs into a spot of bother, two members of Hollywood royalty continue to confound the sceptics by living a romantic dream together. Goodness knows how many times people have predicted that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are about to split up, yet they continue to sail on, with their careers soaring and their A-grade celebrity status intact. And where the one goes, so does the other, with all six children in tow.

The couple have not married, but have been inseparable for the past six years. Pitt maintains that they will marry "when everybody can", a reference to gay marriage. In an interview this week, he speaks glowingly about Jolie, saying one of the "smartest things" he ever did was make her the mother of his children. "Oh, man, I'm so happy to have her," he told Parade Magazine.

In contrast, he gives a stinging account of his "pathetic" life and miserable marriage to Jennifer Aniston. "I started to get sick of myself sitting on a couch, holding a joint, hiding out. It started feeling pathetic," he said. Pitt and Aniston were married for five years and she remains bitter about the split, blaming Jolie for it.

But Pitt said in the interview that while he was with Aniston he realised he wasn't living an interesting life. "I think that my marriage had something to do with it, trying to pretend the marriage was something that it wasn't."

The actor told Parade magazine he was now content with his life. "I'm satisfied with making true choices and finding the woman I love, Angie, and building a family that I love so much."