Don't date us if...

Times LIVE has come up with a list of traits that they don't want in potential partners following Lin Sampson's Don't date me if... column

You believe that you are inhabited by the Holy Spirit – unless said spirit is named Johnny Walker.

You have a dependency problem

You have long nails

You have excessive make-up

You think you are too pretty

You weave your hair

You have a criminal record

You live in a rich suburb, drive a nice car, hold a great job and yet your conversation is still dominated by how the country is going down the tubes

You are on Mxit

You smoke cigarettes (Other stuff is fine so long as you share)

You don't watch sport

If the last book you read was your high-school set-work book

You think current affairs has something to do with sexual relations

You wear a chain saying "Open relationships"

You believe a partner should not have friends of the opposite sex

You wear enough metal to mess with compass directions

You have no ambition

Your idea of fun is shopping

You can't cook to save your life

You are a raving feminist/chauvinist

You have no sense of humour

You think education is all there is to being bright

If you can't tell the difference between art and porn (Unless of course, you approve of the latter)

You think looking good is a good substitute for being a decent human being

You don’t do nature

You look down on enthusiasm

You don’t like arguing

Your idea of morality is less about your own behaviour, more about your neighbour’s

You believe in different ways of knowing – only when the most accurate ways of knowing contradict your bullshit

You believe you don’t have any bullshit. We all do

You are one of those people who puts little signs up in toilets at work. Seriously, it’s creepy