He is very casual about school work and does not seem to realise that success requires effort and dedication. I rant all the time, trying to get him to pay attention to his school work. But he ignores me and procrastinates, often not doing the work at all or doing a very sloppy job of it.
I am very desperate and do not know what to do to make him realise the importance of studying and getting used to doing his chores well and on time.
Concerned Parent, by e-mail
Dear Concerned Parent
The problem you have is that your son is above the average age of learners that are in Grade 9 and therefore, his emotional state is very different.
An underlying problem of his attitude could be that he is probably intimidated by the fact that younger boys and girls know more than he does and he is displaying these kinds of anti-social behaviour to get out of the situation or prove himself to be "smarter".
In a Further Education and Training (FET) institution he would be with pupils his age. He needs to enrol at an Adult Basic Education and Training (Abet) centre and complete his schooling there. Alternatively, he can go to a FET college to find out what his options are in light of his age and having attempted Grade 9 already.
At the FET college he could begin a career in a trade. I would recommend that he takes a psychometric test to evaluate his personality profile; that is, is he better suited to working with people or by himself, for example. The test would help determine his capabilities.
The final lesson you can teach him is to make him earn cash in some part-time job and impress upon him that menial jobs could be his life if he does not study.
You need to be strict here and not compensate his needs for fun and games.
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