A friend lost his mother recently. For various reasons it was a struggle to locate my inner Mzwakhe Mbuli and compose the perfect message. First, I don’t believe we should lie to each other in times like these. After all, we don’t really mean it when we say the deceased is in a better place, seeing none of us have been there. Second, I harbour a repulsion for meaningless, rhetorical platitudes. My aversion is so strong that asked to speak at a deceased friend’s funeral 17 years ago, I implored the mourners to exercise silence as judiciously as they could in future. That before insisting on a few moments of silence. Then I walked offstage, after two minutes. The moment was as effective and dramatic as being hoisted into the FNB Stadium air with a jackhammer and dropping the mic...