How enjoyable is sex after your 60s?

Q: Is it possible for me to have a satisfactory sex life after my 60s?

A: The field of geriatric medicine is not all about chronic illness or palliative care. Last week I was speaking at a wellness event and one of the older participants shared that her co-workers are always surprised when she shares her sexual experiences and the fact that she is still interested in sex, never mind that she is having sex.

There are medical, psychosocial and practical reasons why elderly people may lose interest in sex. Medical causes such as erectile and ejaculatory dysfunction, menopause and other hormone-related conditions, cardiovascular disease and general wellness are the more commonly discussed issues.

Bereavement, a change in living arrangements or space and previous unresolved anxieties about sex and relationships can have an impact on desire, ability to enjoy sex and the sexual partners one has to choose from.

It is unfortunate that society still views elderly people having sex as something weird or unexpected. In fact, some of the most liberated people having sex are elderly, as research has shown that post-menopausal women often enjoy sex more at this stage as the risk of pregnancy is gone.

Many of the patients who report to have satisfactory sex lives have not always been eager to explore or be experimental with sex and sexual partners. Much of the mainstream portrayal of sexual relationships, intimacy and dating even on dating apps is slanted towards younger people.

Doing research about sex positions, lubricants and the impact of your medication on your libido, pleasure and performance will improve your experiences.

Sexual rights demand of us to ensure that healthcare professionals offer information and manage illness in a way that considers the desires of the patient. Similarly, products and erotic literature portraying the elderly in affirming ways are needed. It is never too late to start having the best sex of your life.

• Dr Tlaleng Mofokeng (MBChB), sexual and reproductive health practice, Disa Clinic, safersex.co.za. Mofokeng has recently been named SA's Commissioner of Gender Equality by President Cyril Ramaphosa.

Do you have a question about sex?

E-mail your questions to lifestyle@sundaytimes.co.za with SEX TALK as the subject. Anonymity is assured.