PODCAST | Burnley striker Lyle Foster on his battle with depression

Burnley and Bafana Bafana striker Lyle Foster has revealed his battles with depression, explaining how he was not coping with the pressures and expectations of being a professional footballer.

Foster said he recognised he was in a dark place while playing for KVC Westerlo in Belgium, soon after turning out for Bafana in their 1-0 Africa Cup of Nations qualifying defeat to Morocco in Rabat in June 2022.

Foster told Marawa Sports Worldwide Westerlo and Burnley have been excellent in providing support for his situation, where he at times considered taking his own life.

The striker said he watched the SuperSport TV documentary Bucs Camp, where several of his old Orlando Pirates teammates from the club where he came through the youth structures detailed similar battles with the pressures of being a professional footballer. He felt the need to speak on the issue.

“I was in Belgium around the game against Morocco. I went back to Belgium and just wasn’t feeling OK,” Foster explained.

“Something started to creep in and I realised I was  spiralling downwards. I had severe depression and anxiety and it was very difficult to cope with where I was at with performing, with all of these things and focusing on my reality.

“But through the grace of God I’m able to do so now and focus 100%.”

Foster was asked when he realised something was wrong.

“I was in my apartment by myself. I realised I felt this huge sense of loneliness and emptiness, like I was chasing towards something that I didn’t know if it was for me.

“I felt I couldn’t freely express myself around my teammates. It was a lot more difficult to do things footballers are supposed to do.

“I used to try to go to training, play games, but honestly the best thing to do at that time in my life was to get back home and sleep.

“It was like no real excitement or looking forward to anything. That’s when I realised I’m in a bit of a pickle here, in some trouble.

“And of course I panicked a bit. I didn’t know what was going on and how to deal with it because it was the first time I was in a position like that.”

Foster said with the noise in his head he could not enjoy football and was numb to life, and he felt weak and “clouded by the darkness”. He said his club then, Westerlo, “really went out on a limb to help me”.

Asked if it reached a point of considering taking his life he said: “To be very honest there were some times like that, just not seeing it through.

“And being difficult connecting with family and friends. Because at the same time you  think in coloured and black societies mental health isn’t really understood and no-one really understands what you’re going through.

“And you couldn’t be bothered to go out and explain what it is. But my family have been so good with me, the structure that has been built around me has been so good to the point where I’m comfortable, enjoying training and life again.”

Foster was asked if, as he got the opportunity to move to Burnley, the situation cleared up or continued through his move to the UK.

“I did transfer with that depression [with me]. It was difficult in the beginning — the expectations and needing to perform. I was dealing with so much day in and day out.

“I think a turning point for me was coming home to South Africa. I sat with my parents and someone who’s mentoring me spiritually and they just guided me through it, and directed me to the Lord. That’s really what gave me a new lease on life.

“I was trying to figure it out on my own. Now I know I don’t need to — I’ve got support and friends and family who love me.

“And just the position I’m in to be a urnley player, I don’t understand the goodness of the Lord to be preparing to go into my first season in the Premier League. It’s something I’ve dreamed of my whole life.”

Foster played 11 matches arriving at Vincent Kompany's Burnley in the second half of last season, as they won the Championship and were promoted to the Premier League. 

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