Feel the pull of the falls at Tsowa Safari Island, Zimbabwe

“Real Africa begins north of the Zambezi.” I don’t know what “real Africa” means or even who said it. Part of me is reluctant to think it might have been “Mad” Mike Hoare in The Road to Kalamata.

But not to let “mercenary motives” get in the way of good marketing, Zambia for a time branded itself as “Real Africa” and you often hear the phrase when people talk about the Zambezi River.

Perhaps fancifully, I like to think of the Zambezi as a line between civilisation and wilderness in much the same way Eugene Marais did when he wrote about the Waterberg and the little “stream of Nile” separating the “notes of a piano” from the “howling of jackals”.

These are the kind of thoughts that “find” one on the deck of a luxurious tented camp on an island in the middle of the Zambezi, 40 clicks up from the falls.

An evening is coming in across the water, which turns with the sky from deep orange into a dark bruise. There seems something so right about drinking a Zambezi over the Zambezi that it seems wrong not to have another. And I begin to catch on the rising breeze the smell of supper, fresh river bream with garlic and lemon and black pepper.

After the heat of the day, you can almost feel the bush give a collective sigh of relief, followed slowly by a deep intake of breath ahead of the horrors you imagine the night will bring. But for now, there’s just the lambent light, the plaintive cry of birds and the gentle chortling of hippo.

It seems wrong to call the Zambezi a “river”. It’s too big, troubled and wild for that. People still think vengeful gods lurk in its depths, and sitting here, watching millions of tonnes of water slide across the face of the world, all unknowingly doomed for the falls, I begin to understand how someone once long ago called it a “swerving muse”.

I love the falls, but right now I’m glad I’m here. I once had the good fortune to spend a few nights at the Victoria Falls Hotel and it’s as “iconic” as everyone says it is. The view from Stanley’s Terrace over the bridge spanning the Zambezi between Zimbabwe and Zambia, with or without spray, is magnificent. And there is also a piano.

Back then, we argued over high tea about the relative merits of bungee jumping versus white water rafting and finally compromised on the Devil’s Pool, a natural rock swimming pool on the edge of the falls. You can get there by boat but we walked in from the Zambian side, skirting the edge of the falls past a dead buffalo, snared momentarily at the brink by thickets of thorn.

You can only swim in the pool at certain times of the year, and one wonders who calls it and when. People have gone over but not here, which is hard to believe once you’re in it, peering over the edge down a 100m cascade of foam and violence.

It’s not as perilous as it sounds but you do experience a weird buoyancy which requires someone you trust to hold onto your legs, and it is not good for anyone who has supernal longings.

ON THE EDGE

Tsowa, too, teeters on the edge. And not just on the wild edge of the sublime. It survived Covid-19 and came out stronger, and the lodge now has a breakfast terrace and new tents have been embedded into the island’s banks. I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face when I saw mine but I wasn’t the only one who thought theirs was best.

Minimal but stylish, they come with well-stocked fridges, luxury soaps and high thread counts. But in essence, they’re just beautiful life-support systems for outdoor showers and decks.

Ah ... the deck! Mine is furthest from the lodge and juts out across the water with a view into the thick, black night of the Zambezi National Park. I take off my clothes, spray some Peaceful Sleep under my arms, drink some beer, and think about how different life could be and how perfect it sometimes is.

And I can smell it, and I wish I were a better writer so I could tell you better about it. But the best I can say is that Cairo smells like a tomb, and this is its opposite. Equally ancient, the Zambezi smells like death and fresh cut grass, like an old world that will always be new, and a world that doesn’t give a damn about you and never has.

These feelings are only exaggerated when you’re being sucked down it in a kayak, navigating its various perils — the rapids that appear little, the channels that seem obvious — and all the while, belittled by its overwhelming otherness. If a hippo sinks its teeth into your boat and you end up in the water ... don’t swim back to the boat, they tell you.

But for the most part it’s a gentle paddle past meagre settlements on the Zambian side and “Real Africa” on the wrong side, all of it in thrall to the relentless pull of civilisation and its opposite. Because if there’s one thing you’re never not aware of, it’s that you’re on a mainline cable plugged straight into the falls.

But no matter when you come here, it is always worth it to stand in the very spot where David Livingstone first saw them. Our guide made us close our eyes and led us the last metres to this point. Livingstone thought of the queen, but it is "Mosi-oa-Tunya" that forever captures the beauty of this moment.

The town of Victoria Falls is beguiling in a curio kind of way. And if you’re looking for a bit of hustle and bustle and a smattering of nightlife while you hook up your white water rafting or to the scaffoldings of the iconic bridge, then a couple of days here are just about perfect.

I love the flamboyants now coming into bloom, with their flowers of flame and numinous green leaves. And it’s fun to try to work out which tourists are from where in this busy international enclave. But after a while, the daily din of all the helicopters plying their “flights of angels” quickly becomes a reminder of everything you’re trying to get away from by coming here in the first place.

If I could do it all again, I’d do it exactly like we did. Start upriver, 40 clicks maybe, and then work one’s way down to the falls, either game viewing along Zambezi Drive or on the other side of Bulawayo Road through the Chamabondo plains, where the chances of seeing big game are better.

Or maybe I’d spend more time on the river, knowing all the while that it will have its way with me, this swirling muse, and inevitably deliver me to what, from the plane window, if you’re lucky enough to see it, looks like a giant smoking crack in the surface of the planet that will never be civilised.

• Haw was a guest of Tsowa Safari Island.

GETAWAY AT A GLANCE

Where it is: Tsowa Safari Island is in the Zambezi National Park, 40km upstream from Victoria Falls. 

Getting there: Fast Jet, SAA and Airlink offer flights to Victoria Falls Airport, the most direct routing. You will need a transfer to Tsowa's private entrance to the Zambezi National Park. From there, the lodge offers return 4X4 transfers in an open game vehicle to the river and boat transfers to island.

Accommodation: Three River View Safari tents and five River Deck Safari tents  with indoor and outdoor showers and views over the river and Zambezi National Park.  

Activities: Morning and evening game drives, guided bush walks, guided island walks, bird watching, canoeing and sunset river cruises.  Day trips to Victoria Falls for stays of three nights or longer.

Rates: From $410 (about R7,385) per person sharing per night. Includes accommodation, meals and beverages (excluding premium brands), daily activities, laundry, return transfers from their private entrance to Zambezi National Park.  Excludes conservation levy of $7 per person per day.

SPECIAL SADC rate: 30% off the normal River View Safari tent, valid until June 30 2023. A “pay for three, stay for four” offer is valid for May 23. Contact the lodge to inquire about long-stay discounts.

CONTACT: Call 035-474-1473, email res@isibindi.co.za or visit their website.